Skywatcher
MyPTSD Pro
As a child I created a belief that if I please others I will be loved. Then in a bad csa experience I used that in the thought that it would keep me safe. Pain was followed by comfort by the man. As a young adult, another bad situation led to rape. I was thinking that It would keep me safe to do as I was told. Followed by no comfort, then comfort, then harassment. Now adult work place. You kind of need to please people higher than you to stay in the game. Had a recent workplace conversation in which they weren’t pleased. This triggered past traumas and fears.
We are working on it in therapy. Flash emdr stuff. However, I’m now really confused. If pleasing others to stay safe or loved is a cognitive distortion, is pleasing others in general wrong? How would anyone remain employed? I don’t know what the healthy replacement behavior is.
We are working on it in therapy. Flash emdr stuff. However, I’m now really confused. If pleasing others to stay safe or loved is a cognitive distortion, is pleasing others in general wrong? How would anyone remain employed? I don’t know what the healthy replacement behavior is.