Posers And Apologists

[Friday]

I haven't been here long enough to start picking up on themes and patterns. Outside of my own, anyway. Some days I blather on, other days I've got brevity.

My rule of thumb is only to reply if I know jack shit about something. You & I seem to be having the opposite kind of problems right now... You're afraid of homelessness, but it's my favorite option; you're looking years ahead, and I'm freaking myopic right now in hours and days; you're dealing with an elderly parent, and I never have - so I have no damn idea what I'd do (what I think I would do, and what I actually end up doing are often worlds apart); you care what your family thinks / they're hugely influential in your decision making, I could care less about what my family thinks of me (but only on Valium). I love them dearly, but they don't make my decisions for me. Case in point, they're going to loathe where I'm moving (still would rather be homeless, but taking one more stab at the member of society thing. Sigh.) They're going to kick about it, and I'm going to ignore them.

As far as how others answer? I take what I like & leave the rest. I personally need pretty rough handling, clarity, and humor... And the occasional swift kick to the head... Others need different things. Lotta personalities on here. Sympathy makes my teeth itch, it's not helpful to me, but it's still someone making an effort. Any effort in this mess is often damn hard. So I'm not gonna kick over their forgetting to check their sympathy at the door. At worst it's a nod. <grin> Doesn't mean it's wrong to kick about it, though. Might be the exact right thing. One of my favorite posts of all time is essentially a big fat "Knock it off!".

 

[Bill Dickerson]

If I had my druthers I'd build a house in the side of hill surrounded by a lot of woods and put a high electrified fence around the whole thing. That would be just to keep the relatives away.....

I have patience for kids and dogs but little else.

Anybody got a druther and $100,000.

Me too on the teeth itch.....

 

[bell]

Bill, if it is your money that she is using, it is fully within your right to make decisions, not hers. And, although I'm not at that age yet, I've seen from watching others, there reaches a point where others have to take control and make the big changes and choices that their elders don't want to make for sake of everyone.

Yes, your mom can't change in her ways, but it sounds like the proverbial nut didn't fall far from the tree there. :) If she's like a lot of older people I know, she's either too scared to make the changes herself or so ready to die :/ that she's said, 'the heck with this world' and has checked out. In both those cases, literally no one else is going to make these changes, so you can either accept it or change. It's your choice and since it's your money, this has sod all to do with what she wants at this point.

Therefore, it sounds like you need to either step up, chime in, and make some big changes or get used to your truck. From what you have said, those are your only two options. Which one do you really want for the rest of your life? Do nothing and you get your truck and stay stuck. Make a choice and a change and your life becomes yours to lead, with your mother still there. Choosing to change is what moves you forward. But, you have to ask yourself... Do you want it bad enough? And I say this as much to me as I say it to you.

 

[NoWhereKnowWhere]

If you get a group of mentally unwell people together what do you expect? Haha. You know the old do unto others as you would have others do unto you. Maybe that's it. People read your posts and think if I were in that situation what would I want to hear? or what should someone tell me that I can't see from my biased point of view. For some it's just validation that yeah that is a shit situation (the I'm sorry) for others it proactive advice or what ever. Maybe? Just a theory.

 

[Anarchy]

why does a muscle bound rage machine, that even emits a jealous green glow, but has neither sufficeint balls to burst his pants, nor the witts to realize that without reasoning, we're left with only the base animal instincts which failed badly enough to get us all PTSD...

why does that seem like such an appropriate image to accompany this thread?

 

[The Albatross]

I'm sorry isn't particularly helpful to me either... the quotes from books or stuff I don't mind so much.

 

[The Albatross]

Bill, act or accept... and that isn't out of a book either. Ultimately that's all it boils down to.

 

[Bill Dickerson]

Anarchy with all due respect......WHAT?

The base animal instincts didn't fail they just work all too well. It's what kept the Human Race from become lunch.....

 

[TLight]

For myself..........kuddos Bill for feeling free to be real and speak your mind. I find it refreshing.

As far as others explaining you might be having a 'bad attitude' day or something or you need to be more accepting.......well, if you don't feel like it right now and you feel like expressing what you are feeling........well, I say isn't that the purpose of a support group? Not a bunch of people who tell you what you should be feeling and how to respond?

I admire you and am with you 100%. You in Washington State by chance? We could form a real support group where you are validated for whatever you are feeling at the time......not told you shouldn't feel that way.....

YEAH FOR EXPRESSING YOURSELF!

 

[Lucycat]

Anybody got a druther

Can you explain to an English woman what this means?

 

[Friday]

Druthers ... Contraction of "I would rather" / 'I'd rather' / would rather

Civil War (1860s) era as far as I know. All the gee mom I wish I were home, I'd rather be ABC-XYZ than here! Listing out all your druthers, etc.

 

[Nam]

It's very alienating what you wrote Bill. There are plenty of us that are reluctant to post replies and are brave enough to do so. This blanket statement will now have many of us wondering if it's me he's talking about.? I had that thought. I haven't been around for awhile. I was back in 2006. PTSD is a bitch that way in that it's always there. Just in varying degrees. I probably do write things out like in a textbook manner because I feel like there is enough emotion already. State the facts, list some actions, see if there is results. As with all information on the internet, take what you need and leave the rest. PTSD is such a hard illness to live with. It makes people scared. Taking action means taking risks. It means maybe losing all good ground you might have worked so damn hard for. But healing is like that. So it's nice to have people that understand the journey. If you want solutions, ask for them. If you want to just rant, say that too.