Sufferer Ptsd And Blamed

[ResaLock]

I have had PTSD for about 8yrs now. I was diagnosed with it prior, but I did not believe I had PTSD at that time. I believe I was just diagnosed with it at the time, because I went to a therapist for domestic violence. At the time I just sought out support, because I was becoming over whelmed and was depressed.

As time went on I went through more severe traumas, I was diagnosed at the hospital from my injuries 2 times of acute stress. Realizing from those incidents I learned what it was. I know I suffered that before. I was diagnosed with PTSD again. Confirming it, not telling another of my diagnosis of PTSD.

My problem is that I got nothing but heartache and blame from people. It seems as people treat me like I have the plague. I sought out support for PTSD and domestic violence and it seemed like it only got worse and I just had more people attacking me over it. Isolating me and even blaming me. Telling me I got PTSD because only negative people get PTSD. Telling me good things happen to good people and bad things happen to bad people. Even telling me I must of done something wrong to be abused and I can't be innocent, even some mocking me.

I just hear nothing but cruel things blaming me for being abused and having PTSD.

Sometimes I feel more pain from peoples ridicule about it, than I have being tortured by these other people. ...and I have had severe injuries and mental/emotional abuses from my spouse and even others.

 

[Echo]

Hi @ResaLock - these people are so ignorant it is unbelievable. Do NOT believe a word they say. I don't know why they feel entitled to an opinion about something they evidently know nothing about, but they are not supportive, kind and empathetic people, and that is the type of person you need to surround yourself with now.

It is wonderful that you have found your way to this forum. We are all in the same boat - even if we have PTSD for a wide variety of different reasons. You will find lots of information here and lots of support and understanding. We all help each other.

Abusive people try to convince you you are wrong; they deny what has happened and they belittle or minimise what has happened to you. The best thing you can do is realise they are acting in abusive ways and try to put distance between you and them.

Welcome to the forum!

 

[Hashi]

Welcome to the forum.

Who are the people who are saying this to you? I can't help wondering if they might be abusive themselves, if they have some funny religious ideas, or if they've failed you in the past so now they're defending themselves by attacking you.

Anyway, I hope you will find the support you need here. I hope you'll find it in real life too.

 

[Obscurum2005infinity]

I just found this forum last night. My heart goes out to you. It is coming up on 9 years I have had an official diagnosis of PTSD. About 5 years ago I had to move out the town I was in to separate myself from the unsupportive people in my life. One of my best friends who I came to love as a sister, told me one day that she didn't understand why I still had problems it has been 3 years. That I just needed to move on. I told her if it was that easy I would have done that by now. Because boy I wish I could do just that, I imagine things would be easier.

But guess what, things did get better for me after I separated my life from the lives of those unsupportive sometimes negative people. The change was very hard for me to deal with at first. However as time moved on, I realized one day, like someone illuminated everything for me, life had gotten better now that all that wrong sort of clutter was out of my life.

I am glad you found your way here. Even though I am new too, I already feel better knowing I can talk to people with the same difficulties as I have from PTSD.

 

[ResaLock]

@Hashi - Actually it was a therapist who said only negative people get P.T.S.D. I found out later it was a trend being passed around among the psychologist field. I had another T that told me that was not true and disagreed with that. The statement about, "good things happen to good people and bad things happen to bad people were actually a couple of people from a couple different churches, when I reached out for help. Many things were said from church ministers and members that were completely horrible it really did a number on me. As they said more things like, "God protects his own and its because I do not have faith in God or it wouldn't happen." They made other statements like,"God allowed it to happen" or the common one, " I allowed it to happen" (Which I get from most people)

- Don't get me wrong. I am still a believer in God. I just know those things are not of God.- I am not sure your stance on that, but all is well. I respect where ever you at. That is just where I am at. I know personally that is not what God is about and thee is no truth in it. Doesn't mean it doesn't do damage to someone. It does and it hurts bad. Especially when someone claims they are of God and thats how He is presented to me.

The one who said to me, "I must of done something to be abused." Was actually a police officer from reporting an incident. It was devastating.

I have actually had a P.T.S.D Therapist say to me, " P.T.S.D is caused by fear." Putting the blame on me. Saying I have P.T.S.D because I my fear.

It seems every time I turn around and speak about it. Its someone blaming me why I suffer. Even someone telling me I still suffer from it from talking about it. There is much more. I could probably list over a hundred things that has been said to me with the same ideas of putting blame on me.

 

[ResaLock]

Thank you all for your stories, replies, empathy and encouragement. Though it is sad to find others who suffer P.T.S.D. Its good to be with people who understand. I find some sort of conflicting paradox in that statement. I am sure you all know what I mean.

 

[Notsowild]

@ResaLock... My heart goes out to you. I can't believe people could say that to you. I agree with @Hashi these are probably abusive people themselves.

I believe we are sensitive people and we have a lot of ignorance about our disorder. We are here for you. Welcome to the forum

 

[Survivor2Thriver]

The statement about, "good things happen to good people and bad things happen to bad people were actually a couple of people from a couple different churches,

People who spout nonsense like that don't understand basic math. Don't concern yourself with their flawed thinking.

It seems every time I turn around and speak about it. Its someone blaming me why I suffer.

Blame. The word should be banished from the dictionary. Don't concern yourself with the ramblings of idiots.

Many things were said from church ministers and members that were completely horrible it really did a number on me. As they said more things like, "God protects his own and its because I do not have faith in God or it wouldn't happen." They made other statements like,"God allowed it to happen" or the common one, " I allowed it to happen" (Which I get from most people)

Next time say... God gives his best warriors the greatest battles. And watch them scratch their heads. LOL

I had a church therapist tell me to "pray to God to remove them from the face of the earth." Uh huh...that goes against everything Christianity stands for.

I couldn't help myself...it rolled out before I could stop..I said..Really? So now God's a hitman??! LOL Yeah..I don't see her anymore.

P.T.S.D is caused by fear."

It is. And it's a perfectly natural reaction to someone trying to kill you.

 

[ResaLock]

@Survivor2Thriver

Next time say... God gives his best warriors the greatest battles. And watch them scratch their heads. LOL

Wow! That was powerful. It did really make a big difference. When you hear so many people say so many things and more like as I posted. It caused a lot of pain.

...it was ....I don't know what to say.... I did get a few responses over the yeas that were nice and encouraging.
....but that was very strengthening and healing. Thank you!


- Can't believe they said that to you. We do know those things are not of the Christian faith or of God. Glad you stood your ground in your faith.

 

[Tinyflame]

I've heard the opposite, that God is closest to the abused, the abandoned, the broken-hearted, crushed in spirit. And will never leave us. The others are right, apart from grieving such secondary wounding, try to concentrate on the positive and eliminate the negative.

Welcome to you. :hug:

 

[Survivor2Thriver]

It caused a lot of pain.

Indeed. We all want to be loved and understood. I was a sad little girl who desperately needed validation. Somewhere along my way I learned I wasn't going to get it from my dysfunctional family. The only validation I was going to get was going to come from me. And God. :)

 

[intothelight]

Hi ResaLock,

Welcome to the forum!

I am sorry that someone who would call themselves a professional would make those kind of comments to you. Bad things happen, and it doesn't matter if you are a "good" person or a "bad" person, as that has little to do with it. How each person reacts to traumatic experiences is as individual as they are.

There are some great articles here that explain PTSD and how stress can increase symptoms. There is also a lot of information about various types of therapy and symptom management. I hope you find it helpful.

Debbie