PTSD And Sex

[Deleted member 487]

I have little problem with PTSD and sex. Other than the seizures I mentioned. My Traumatic Brain Injury though, is a different story. Women are nice to look at and feel, and sometimes snuggle with, but honestly, they are just plain boring. Or annoying. Or perhaps I have been alone for too long and got used to it....?

 

[deziamazing]

I was physically abused, not sexually, but i have the same issue but i also have an issue with just not having a sex drive at all. But when i do have sex it hurts. And i do have flash backs sometimes durring too.

 

[sassy-snape]

My boyfriend NEVER EVER starts sex with me, if i want anything i go to him which i do as he was abused aswell, he also asks if he can touch me and i GIVE permission, everything i do is through me.

In the past i could NEVER touch a man sexually, he could me but not me him, i just didnt do it, i couldnt.

with my new boyfriend i couldnt wait to do things to prove my love of him, it wasnt sex with us it was proving our love for each other. sex is something different to us.

Try thinking of them as sex and making love, they are two very different things to me and it will be like a cloud bing shifted. it helped me.

i hope this helps you

 

[Seeking_Nirvana]

My problem mostly lies in the foreplay? Once I have sex I just dissociate until it's over.

Tammy

 

[JustJane]

I don't like sex. Never have. I will not do oral either way. That has been a long-standing rule I never break.

What I say here is true.

And yet... I am as promiscuous as a rock concert fan. Sex is all I think about. I have profiles on five online sites with pictures that leave nothing to the imagination. Nothing. I've met five men from these sites. One remains a friend but a very conservative friend. I am careful what I disclose to him. I know he likes me as a person and I like him as a person. We get together maybe 4 times a year, on average. I don't offer what he likes and he just doesn't grasp what I'm looking for. And we're OK with that. He's looking for no strings attached affection and so am I. That much, we can give each other. But that's where it stops. I know he is dating other women and he knows I have several profiles on several sites always looking for - "something."

That "something" is punishment. Disciplinary measures I believe I am long overdue for. But I'm not a masochist.

I don't believe my view of sex is normal by any stretch of the imagination. But I can't remember it ever being any different.

 

[pandora]

I think that if your partner was really informed about how this disorder does in fact make us feel may help.

I had an ex-boyfriend, when the PTSD started....he wanted to know...."What was he supposed to do...wait until his dick fell off" Needless to say we are not together full time. That was 5 years ago, we see each other every once and a while now and he seems more understanding.

Also....there is a real medical diagnosis, I think it is called dyspareunia...painful sex. It can be treated with lubricant and sometimes hormones, depending on your age. It might help to get a full medical work up.....take care.

 

[Dylan]

I have problems with sex, also. I am very rarely present and accounted for.

Unbeknownst to my partner, I dissociate most of the time and have to pretty much fantasize the whole time to get me there. I sometimes feel sick/guilty about it, but really, I am working on so many other things to make day-to-day living better that working on sex has to wait.

-Dylan

 

[funluvnbrenda1]

I remarried after 6 years of being divorced, this 2nd marriage didn't last 10 months. I so need to work on my trauma stuff too before I start a relationship. I learned that while with this man he gave me herpes. Now I have to explain to someone else what I've got. I did enjoy the sex after 6 years, but I was starting to have it when I didn't really want it. I will never do that again. It's your body, you have the right to say no, no matter what they say. If they love you like they say they do then they shouldn't have a problem. I find confusion is part of PTSD. We run sceniro's around in our heads and thats where the confusion is.

bren

 

[healing007]

Thanks for bringing this up! I've never felt completely comfortable during sex. I haven't had many partners - those I've been in love with. The most enjoyable sex I have had is when I was drunk. Now I don't drink... it's frustrating. I have never had an orgasm. I know it's because of the abuse. grrrr.

 

[sassy-snape]

My boyfriend NEVER EVER starts sex with me, if i want anything i go to him which i do as he was abused aswell, he also asks if he can touch me and i GIVE permission, everything i do is through me.

In the past i could NEVER touch a man sexually, he could me but not me him, i just didnt do it, i couldnt.

with my new boyfriend i couldnt wait to do things to prove my love of him, it wasnt sex with us it was proving our love for each other. sex is something different to us.

Try thinking of them as sex and making love, they are two very different things to me and it will be like a cloud bing shifted. it helped me.

i hope this helps you

Hi around 6 monthes of making love with my partner i now hate sex.

I start thinking about what happened to me and i find the thought of being touched unbearable, its gone to extent where me n my partner cant sleep in the same bed or take his clothes off around me because a naked man scares me stiff! i dont no what to do

 

[shiraz]

I also shake uncontrollably after sex. Sex is good and I enjoy it, but afterwards I sob and shake - don't know why and can't stop it.