Other Ptsd Due To Being Controlled By A Cult

[elektriknathan]

Well, nutbags, you've already gotten through, so it shouldn't be worse than /that/ plays into your hands :...

Nice way of looking at it. Hard to see the shore when you've been swimming in rough seas for a long time.

 

[Sideways]

Yes, something similar.

For me, the oppressed feeling you're describing is realising that the thoughts and beliefs that I have about myself and the world, aren't mine. They're the stuff I was conditioned to believe. And if I try and peel them away, I'm not sure that my brain is even capable of having free, autonomous thoughts of my own.

And that feeling is, yeah, really oppressive.

Best of luck at your appointment. Take your time though, yeah? There's no quick fix for stuff like this.

 

[elektriknathan]

Yes, something similar.

For me, the oppressed feeling you're describing is realising that the t...

I know there's no quick fix. Thanks for your reply. I'm glad people get it and I'm sure I will be further in healing when I go to this forum for support and reinforcement.

slowly but surely one step at a time I will move forward. It took me 8 years to get to where I am now where I acknowledge that what happened to me was not right

Thanks so much. You can be free of a brainwashed mind. You know you've been indoctrinated. Perhaps you can discuss this with your therapist. I've changed therapists because I was mentioning this to the old one but they had a bias to be pro religion which I found restrictive.

Thank you

 

[elektriknathan]

FYI: Went to the doctor before, got a referral to a new psychologist just around the corner (I have agoraphobia)
Doctor agrees I may have PTSD but is waiting for diagnosis from new psychologist for confirmation (fair enough, being professional)

That cult invades my mind even now, when I challenge their doctrines in my mind I am more fearful than ever. I also keep thinking I need to be controlled and I need to be abused and manipulated. Probably some conditioning there.

Thanks for all the support, will do my best to check in on the forum and let you all know how I am doing but I am also here for those who need someone to chat about stuff. Peace

 

[joeylittle]

Before the cult I was carefree, hardly worrying, looking forward to challenges and I had a little bit of fear associated with past trauma but it was barely effecting me. Now after cult and more trauma I feel vulnerable all the time

I'm curious, how old were you pre-cult vs. post-cult?

 

[elektriknathan]

I'm curious, how old were you pre-cult vs. post-cult?

OK
Forced into it when I was 0
Went out of it on my own accord at age 18 but harrassed by cult members in various ways from 18 until 24
Harrassed by cult members putting material in my letterbox, giving me looks of disdain when I was out and about and I encountered them by chance (minding my own business);
Cult members are socially conservative and are voters of Right wing parties (they love love Trump, GOP, Tea Party)
I worked for a Left wing political organisation (cult members saw me, looked in horror)
Had a near death experience (seemed to me to be like that)
Went into cult because I thought it was Christianity properly expressed (childhood indoctrination) age 25;
Left cult totally at age 26;
So many broken promises, hurt, anger, resentment..
MEH

 

[joeylittle]

So the pre-cult period you refer to, when you were relatively carefree, could see that you had challenges, but had some optimism that you could work through them - was that between 18-24?

 

[elektriknathan]

So the pre-cult period you refer to, when you were relatively carefree, could see that you had chall...

yes indeed.
Weird thing is, when I stopped attending at age 18, the stuff didn't effect me anyway
Then again, I was in a normal high school at age 13 - 18 so I guess that offset a lot of the damage that the cult would have done
The aim was to homeschool me (one of the cult members advocated this because he did it to all his kids)

 

[elektriknathan]

So the pre-cult period you refer to, when you were relatively carefree, could see that you had chall...

the cult came down heavy on me when i made a commitment to it,
total and complete control
but given the link between human behaviour and environment, i have experienced a major reduction in anxiety and defensiveness because i no longer associate with the cult members
most of them leave me alone and are terrified of encountering me because i am "one of them" (gonna burn to a crisp in hell)
i developed agrophobia which i still have to this day after being in the cult (onset was late 2012)

 

[Ronin]

i developed agrophobia

Well, agoraphobia can be worked through as other exposure. Point out to yourself the days you're just fine, & skills, all sorts of skills, you've utilized to this point to keep yourself alive?

I think we had a thread about that somewhere here some time ago, or several; things you're good at, even if you don't think of them as 'skills' all too often. Anything you do to keep alive.

 

[Frenzy3674]

Greetings all,
I was involved in a cult (thats what I consider it to be).
This cult was operati...

I was raised in a cult. So yes.

 

[Carmen J. Brown]

Greetings all,
I was involved in a cult (thats what I consider it to be).
This cult was operati...

Okay here's the thing I have been homeschooled (I'm graduating this year from homeschool high school) and I actually can testify that most homeschool groups are cults. Although I have met a few homeschool families who don't do that shit, (and who have brought up their childeren in a way that doesn't f*ck with their heads) for the most part, it's true.