Sufferer Ptsd For 13 Years

[AlmostHome]

Hi forum members,

I had a motorcycle accident 13 years ago. I was knocked out on impact and have absolutely no recollection of the accident.

6 months after I started having odd flashes of something. It was almost like a knife and blood running on the floor or something like that. Also started to have Sleep Paralysis which really freaked me out. Then started to have voices inside my head tell me to kill people (obviously I never did, otherwise I would not be here to tell the tale). I started to drink heavily to drown it all out and then all the stuff stopped happening a few months later. I did not seek any treatment at that time.

2004/2005 I commenced a 6 year long relationship and was alerted by my partner that I may have depression. Went to the doctor and was prescribed Paxil and counselling. The counsellor diagnosed me with PTSD. I was also sent to a psychiatrist and assessed. Dysthymia was another of my diagnoses but I strongly believe it is more PTSD than Dysthymia. I will admit there was a pre-existing mental issue which started at 13 which meant not being able to eat in public or in public situations (could not keep food down if in public, started sweating, irrational fear and panic) which stopped not long after commencing paxil. However if I think back to before and after the accident I do think there was a major change to how things felt.

13 years down the track, 1 failed long term relationship, several issues with employment due to both chronic pain and PTSD, here I am. I am constantly tired, I have a skin condition called psoriasis that I developed not long after the accident. It was a little bit of an issue as a child but nothing to what it is today. I understand stress can make it worse. It affects my appearance and eats away at my confidence.

I have been on all sorts of medication. Paxil, Citalopram, Fluoxetine, Escitilopram and now currently Mirtazapine. Recently injured my back at work and have been off work a lot lately because of that. Still having major issues with sorting my life out as I broke up with my abusive partner a year and a half ago. I really hate my current life and don't really know where to turn. My GP is not all that supportive so am looking at changing to a new one.

Basically just want a better life and to meet and talk to people who have been through similar circumstances and would like to know what worked for them.

Does leaving PTSD untreated cause any long term issues that don't resolve? I went through some CBT and medication. Was that enough?

Thanks,

M

 

[AlmostHome]

Also worth noting, I was in Intensive Care for 10 days as I had a fat embolism and would have passed away had I been any older or been pre-disposed to cardiac/heart issues.

Sustained 2 major injuries, shattered femur and broken wrist. A lot of bruising. Concussion - woke up on the road then passed out again when they moved me due to the pain. Woke up in Accident and Emergency but it's all a bit hazy.

 

[Deleted member 12723]

Hi AlmostHome and welcome:)

You have alot going on. I'm not an authority, but I do have ptsd. I know that symptoms can be managed and life is supposed to get better. it is better to be in treatment with someone who is helping you. if they are not helping you then you have to keep looking till you find someone who can. i know easier said than done.

Mabe someone will come along who is more qualified to be able to assist you . You are not alone. Please don't give up and hang in there.

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

Welcome to the forum. :)

I'm not a doctor, but were you checked for a TBI after your accident?

Sorry that so much is going on. I would go for a psychiatrist not a GP, GP's are to general.

Hang in there and take care of yourself!

 

[AlmostHome]

I am unsure as I have never seen my notes from when I was in hospital. I was diagnosed with mild TBI back in 2005. Are they meant to do scans to prove it physically? None have ever been performed. I was sent to a psychiatrist sometime ago and am unsure on their diagnosis still

 

[AlmostHome]

Also worth mentioning, 1.5 years ago I was involved in the receiving end of a domestic dispute. Those 30 minutes play through my head every day without fail and strikes fear into my heart and into my mind. The fact that over here in NZ support for male domestic violence (and dear god, I find this word hard to use) victims is minimal, has not been at all helpful either.

I feel that the incident was traumatic enough to make my existing PTSD worse. I still have very vivid and graphic detailed memories of the incident though. I am not sure if that means anything. It keeps on replaying and I don't want it to.

I was coping reasonably well up until the end of my relationship, which was to me a bit of a shock to say the least. My coping strategies towards the end of the relationship though were predominantly "Ostrich Syndrome" orientated, possibly contributing to the breakup. I also understand my ex partner had PTSD of sorts, possibly some other disorders. This post really though is about me and how both the MBA 13 years ago and the other incident 1.5 years ago deeply affected me.

Apologies for the myriad of "afterthought" posts. Things just keep on coming to me that I think are rather relevant.

 

[KP the nut]

Hi and welcome to the forum.

Take your time looking around and post as and when you feel able.

(((HUGS))) if you accept them
KP

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

I was diagnosed with mild TBI back in 2005. Are they meant to do scans to prove it physically?

I was just asking because of your motorcycle accident, I hope I did not offend you. I believe they would be common with motorcycle accidents. And yeah, scans are how they prove them, because TBI are brain injury's, they are not invisible, they can see them. But they can be life changing from what I read. So I guess the point I was getting at is I hope you are seeking help for it?

Maybe I am being noisy? :oops:

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

Apologies for the myriad of "afterthought" posts. Things just keep on coming to me that I think are rather relevant.

Happens to me too. There are member diary's here, that might help you get through all your thoughts. I've had one for over a year now...still having "afterthought's". :O_o:

 

[AlmostHome]

I'm pretty hard to offend generally :cool: You didn't offend me at all. I do know I was put through a scanning machine (whole body) but am unsure as to whether did any brain scans.

I'm sure I could find out if I contacted the hospital I was in for a copy of my notes though. I am pretty sure there would have at least been a case of mild TBI though. There is a definite connection with the happenings after the accident and the accident itself I am sure..

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

Yup. That's why I asked. Was a little concerned because I associate motorcycle accident with brain injuries. And TBI's can cause differences in normal moods and behavior. Might want to look into. Get better treatment along with PTSD treatment. :)

Take care.