Ptsdr 4 Ptsdr

[IamFree]

I am thinking hypothetically here...Having ptsd means that you end up gravitating towards and hanging out with other people with similair problems and as we dont choose who we fall in love with what happens then. How do such relationships work and can they work. I was thinking of the pros and cons

pros...being with some one who understands what you have been through
being able to help each other along the way.

cons could get codependent and based on rescuing and caretaking
low self esteem just choosing someone because you think there broken as you are .

Anyone with more experience of this than me ?

 

[AngelKeeperJ]

You read my mind! I have wondered about this myself. You hit the nail on the head for sure. Perfect questions.

I have met people (a man) who is really very awesome, who I think I would have at some point considered a relationship. All of my relationships have failed, and none of those men had PTSD, and were chosen by me at really low points in time. As a result, I have given up totally, and plan to be single for the rest of my life. I am 60, and have been single since I was 37.

You ask a VERY important question, and unfortunately, I don't have any answers. The"cons" you list are extremely valuable, and deserve contemplation. I may have more to say later, after some thought.

Thanks for bringing this up!
AKJ

 

[Deadman]

I don't have any experience with it but I suspect it would be like trying to put out a fire with gasoline.

 

[IamFree]

I don't have any experience with it but I suspect it would be like trying to put out a fire with gasoli...

lol

 

[Freedomfighter]

I am thinking hypothetically here...Having ptsd means that you end up gravitating towards and hanging o...

I think ptsd sufferers just really understand what this condition is about. Most other people dont, but you have to be careful, there are ptsd sufferers who can be extremely abusive too.

 

[Parley]

I never would have dated someone like me. A few years after trauma, I met my husband and by that time, I knew what I didn't want and I was all over that list. My husband has openly wondered what would happened if he acted the way I did in a couple situations. He believes I would have left him and I believe he's right.

 

[NoWhereKnowWhere]

I was and I guess I am still seen as the peace keeper and fixer of my family. My mother was mentally unwell as were my siblings. I absolutely know that if I was in a relationship with someone who was as mentally unwell as I am I'd fall straight back into the role. I would neglect myself for the sake of someone else. I would take care of them and dismiss my own needs and pretend I'm ok. I have to stop myself from doing that in the relationship I'm in and my other half is pretty stable and really doesn't need it.

Saying that most of my friends have some issues or another and I think I can really empathise with them and vice versa because of that.