Relationship Questions about therapy

[Glara]

Ha! Good question. I don't know what we are. We have very separate lives and still live in other states. Basically, I just take it one day at a time. I'm here for him until I can't be anymore, if that makes any sense.

He's in a really bad place right now. If he comes out of it, I don't know what he'll want from me. Right now, sometimes he really wants me around and says things like I can make him feel better. Which may be true for a moment. And I tell him that. And I tell him I'm flattered but that he knows I can't make him better. And of course he does know that.

So, like I said, one day at time.

 

[MyWillow]

A therapy session wipes me out for at least a day and has done so for up to a week. We are focussing as much as possible on stabilisation but the smallest thing triggers dissociation and flashbacks plus no memory of it afterwards.

And I don’t even know what’s so traumatising in my life apart from growing up in a somewhat dysfunctional family. Overwork has been my drug of choice for a long time and it’s clearly not a coping mechanism that is currently working so well anymore.

Disclaimer: I’m not diagnosed with anything although apparently secondary structural dissociation is totally my thing.

 

[Pippi427]

Today is therapy day for my vet. He lets me know ahead of time because in the past he has been non-communicative afterwards. In his words, "My brain is a pretzel." He's actually made a lot of progress lately, but I think it still takes a lot out of him when he goes. I remember when I went to counselling for a previous abusive situation I left, I had to switch my appointments to weekends because I would be so sad, it was like I watched the Lifetime channel all day and couldn't find the remote to change the channel. Of course, I know his trauma is not what I experienced as trauma, but it helps me get my brain around how he might feel about interacting with people after therapy.

Yesterday he was really lively, happy, chatty...today nothing. I'm wondering if he was a little hyper-aroused because he knew he had the appointment? We have not had the opportunity to spend much time together lately and I am sad for that, but he has stayed in touch regularly, as agreed and is taking care of himself a lot better now. I guess I'm a little worried for him that he'll take a step back after making progress and that's why I'm writing here now to talk about my fears. It sounds like that might be normal for this type of thing and to be expected, but I really want him to keep the progress going with his physical health even if he has to go slower with his mental health. It seems his friends (me, his best friend) and mom are the only ones that are able to talk him into looking after his health. I don't want him to get down and lose that connection with us.

 

[Freida]

hat he'll take a step back after making progress and that's

Yep. Two steps forward one step back. Every time I get ahead it means something new comes up and I have to start over again. And it sucks and sadly for supporters it's a battle I have to fight on my own....but that doesn't mean alone. There's a difference. I know hubby is there and that he worries....but he can't help me with trying to beat my brain into submission. He's one the sidelines for that. And it makes me feel bad because I know it must be hard. But it's life in a ptsd relationship

 

[lostforgottensoul]

I was just wondering about therapy. Is it exhausting?

Sufferer here. I sleep the entire day after therapy. It's super exhausting for me.

 

[Pippi427]

Sufferer here. I sleep the entire day after therapy. It's super exhausting for me.

...[/QUOTE]

That is what he did...slept all day, but was sweet enough to text me when he woke up in the middle of the night to tell me he was ok. Thanks for listening guys. I'm OK! I went to roller derby practice with my friends and did something for myself. I did not sit around the house and fret about him. He hates it when I do that anyway.