This one therapist gives me way too much material, I do therapy with a family member with him. This is not a therapist that I selected.
T: This is your spring, you are like a flower emerging!
Me: (roll eyes in real life)
T: You came a broken child a few weeks ago, now look you are a capable strong woman!
Me: You certainly like your metaphors! (roll eyes in real life)
T: That's what guys do, they blow up and say stupid things. That's what us guys do.
Me: That's awesome anger management advice. Let me ask, do you have a therapist? (In real life this was met with a raised eye brow)
Me: I'm very careful with my boundaries.
T: So you don't want to date, you can join women's groups. I mean I am not asking for myself.
Me: How has it come to being that I sit and listen to this weekly? Just wondering. (I am sure this was met real life with knee jerk eye roll)
T: So you are having this problem with your sister... I'm trying to understand.
Me: I do not have a sister.
T: It sounded like you did!
Me: No, I do not.
T: You are so strong!
Me: I am myself.
T: You do not drink, do drugs or chase MEN!
Me: Ah, I never really did.
T: Oh you should hear what I hear in this office, I sit here all day! You should HEAR the things I hear!
Me: Silent, trying not to physically shake my head....
