Responses To Your Therapist That You Will Probably Never Say

[AmyC]

T: How was your week?
M: Crap-freaking-tastic. :|
T: :O_o:
M: :O_o:
--- silence for a while.

---

T: What are your plans for this coming weekend?
M: I thought about watching the marathon of 'The Back of My Eyelids'. Best. Show. Ever!

---

T: How would you describe sanity?
M: Same way I would try to describe a mystical creature. Non-existent.
T: :roflmao:
M: No laughing! That's going to be the title of my life: 'The Absence of Sanity'.
T: And how would that go?
M: Hey! Not dead yet. Still working on the whole 'life' thing!

 

[Loloma]

M: Can you help with the PTSD
C: No, I have no experience with PTSD but you have to attend all 6 sessions if you want any further help .:rolleyes:

Geez Cath, what an idiot, talk about time wasting. :eek::mad:

 

[Loloma]

I've know my T for 22 years. I think he's gorgeous, we've sort of grown older together. Last session was hilarious.

T: I'm having problems at home with my wife. Haven't spoken to her for a couple of days.
M: Do I get a discount for offering advise. :hilarious:

 

[rainy_daze]

T: Blah, blah, blah...
M: You sure do talk a lot for someone who is supposed to be listening. Please, please, please repeat the last ten minutes of what you said because I was busy trying to hold on to a thought I felt it was important to share with you. You know - for therapeutic purposes :speechless:.

T: [ is talking away, and I am managing to catch the odd word or two ]
M: My God, how can you concentrate with that switch over there being turned on, but nothing is plugged in? And one of the blinds is at an angle. It is very annoying. Plus, this floor looks so dirty. Who cleans this place? I could do it right now. Really, this whole time you were talking, I noticed several improvements that need to be made to this room.

:p In reality, I did say I had to turn off that switch that had nothing plugged into it. I managed to ignore the floor and the blinds, eventually, because I realised I didn't have the necessary tools to fix the blind or clean the floor :laugh: Concentration on a conversation is difficult sometimes.

 

[rainy_daze]

Oh my goodness!!!!!! This was:
a) Beyond obvious
b) Not your point.
Maybe she has avoidance issues? ;)

She is going to use either her mobile or a watch, because I was cracking up with that ticking. I was going to take a digital clock to the last appointment but it had ran out of batteries and I didn't have time to go buy some :(. Seriously though, I told her I cannot stand it. I felt a little like she was saying "Oh no, my exact way of always being with a client has suddenly been compromised, and I don't know how I will cope" because she was a little flustered when having to come up with a soultion:

T: I feel like I am going to explode with that bloody ticking noise! [explained lack of digital clock] Can you use my clock next time instead?
T: Hmmm... I could use my mobile phone. Oh it would be a bit weird if I was always looking at my phone [yes, note the word always].
M: Yeah but I can easily go get batteries for my digital clock and bring it with me next time.
T: Right, ok, that's fine then, it's just I obviously need to keep track of time.

It's not like I'm going to steal an extra minute from her precious schedule. I'm starting to wonder if she can see when I'm not listening to her and she is timing how long it is before I pay attention to her talking again :eek:.

If I was her therapist, I would say she has issues with time management. Myself, I just want that ticking noise to stop.

 

[The Albatross]

"Hey, you were right. It has taken me quite a long time, but I did and do know what was best for me (and how to move forward). I would have appreciated some assistance with figuring it out more quickly though."

 

[CraftyCath]

Geez Cath, what an idiot, talk about time wasting.

Oh that's not the worse by far! At least she was honest.

I was sent to group therapy once which I guess was supposed to be cognitive. At one point the counsellor (not a therapist but a psychiatric nurse) said that chanting was helpful so we were going to do a group 'chanting the mantra.'

Now I'm not opposed to people chanting but this was so not helpful for me. There was no talking through problems just writing stuff down. I got up, went into the kitchen and made a cup of tea. When she came in and asked me if I was OK I said I was fine but could not sit there with all that repetitive noise going on and a cup of tea seamed like a better idea. I was the only person to get up and leave and felt the staff had more problems than I did!

I so get the ticking clock thing, my T has one but I can never block it out.

 

[Loloma]

Hi Cath, chanting has nothing to do with cognitive therapy. I think they were just doing the whole session ad hoc.

I better the cup of tea was much better. Good on you for leaving and making one. I remember a group therapy that I was in at the hospital. Everyone walked round with dolls and dolls prams. It was kind of freaky, seeing a bunch of women in their thirties to sixties walking round like that. I thought they were nuts! For a start I'd never had a doll in my life, so just couldn't get my head around it.

As for the ticking clock, my psychiatrist doesn't have one. We usually go for a walk in the park on a fine day or go and have a flat white at a Cafe and talk. I know just about as much of his life as he does of mine. And yes sometimes he asks me for advice, I know I pay him but me have developed a friendship. I was in love with him 20 odd years ago, as he was a real dish. Now he's just like most older men. Going bald and has a bit of a pot belly. He still a lovely man though.

 

[Bosco2153]

'But I don't WANT to be 'healed'. I don't TRUST being healed! This is my safety net...this armor. This is who I've built myself up to be out of the shards and fragments and thorns left over from my 'childhood', and it's who I am. I just want to vent and be heard and have you say it''s okay to hate the SOB!'

 

[beautifulbroken]

I actually say everything that pops in my head to my therapist. Recently I asked him how he was doing. As he started talking I realized I didn't care how he was doing. So I told him, "Well that's good but we are here for my problems." He suggested adding another session to my week. Oh well.

 

[Springer80]

He suggested adding another session to my week.

For his problems or yours? :confused: :O_o:

 

[Nighthawk]

M. Your homework for the week is to tell me what angry at my pain looks like to you.:D