Self-hate

[ms spock]

They are now quiet most the time but I check in and ask what is needed when I am not feeling well. I listen and life has become more manageable.

Tb

That is a great skill to have developed Therapybankrupt!

 

[nimkekaa]

The more you catch yourself and think about it as hurting a child you become kinder.

Thinking that way would definately be benificial for me. I would do anything for a child.

 

[AngelKeeperJ]

I do have a great T, and I have an appointment on Tuesday. Obviously we will be going back into EMDR, which helped with my daughter. It will get better. That's what I am telling myself anyway.

 

[WillyKat]

I never thought much about whether I hate myself or not. Reading these posts though, I'm really wondering. Maybe I do.

Maybe this is another thread though.

 

[AngelKeeperJ]

I did mean for this thread to discuss the effects of self-hate. It's hard to 'move on' from anything if our basic feeling about ourselves is self-hate! I've been working on treating myself 'well'. It is different, but I think I'll get used to it!!

 

[MagiLisu]

Funny this thread should re-emerge I am really hating myself right now. I look in the mirror and I just hate it.

 

[maddog]

Yeah, me too, it's so huge and painful that I don't even know what to say. I don't know how that can ever be undone.

Maddog

 

[ms spock]

I don't know how to deal with this.

 

[WillyKat]

Ms Spock, I think most of us on this forum, and for sure in this thread, struggle with this. I think the trick to dealing with this is to not expect it to be dealt with in one swift blow; its a journey of a 1000 miles sort of thing that has to begin with a single step.

I got some advice about it once that I think might help: give yourself a break, cut yourself some slack. That doesn't exactly stop the self hate, but it gives you a better place to start.

I know, nice words, harder to actually do it.

 

[ms spock]

Great advice WillyKat!

Thanks for the reminder!

I do need to give myself a break and cut myself some slack. It does give me a better space from which to start.

 

[AngelKeeperJ]

I was doing really well. My son, wife, & baby made a surprise visit to see the big snow we have. After they left, for some reason I was hit with deep sadness, and that stupid self-hate that is a LIE to my soul. I wish I understood.

Maybe because I know how much Dad would have enjoyed it, and it felt empty without him. I suppose I'm angry with myself for still grieving although it's only been 11 weeks. My mom, who is the non-emotional one acts happier now that he is gone than she ever did when he was here.....:cry:

 

[WillyKat]

Your mother *may* just be numb; she may be suffering a lot more than she lets on.