:hello: Hello from California! I just recently found this website and thought it would be a good idea to participate for support from others, as well hopefully supporting others as best as I can.
A little about myself: I joined the Marine Corps at 18 and was sent to Iraq at 19 in 2004. I came back from my tour in Iraq and looking back now my symptoms were quite evident as soon as I returned to the States. This, of course, included things from hyper-sensitivity to the atmosphere around me, self destructive acts and substance abuse.
The substance abuse actually caused me to fail a drug test while in the military and caused an early seperation with an "other than honorable" discharge. I didn't enjoy the military at all so the seperation was actually welcomed by me with open arms, however, the next couple of years to come were not so positive. My substance abuse became worse and worse (to explain my degree of abuse, the list of what I wasn't using was a lot shorter than what I was using) and became more daily than recreational. On top of this, my other symptoms were horrible and I was suffering from some serious internal pain and anger. Now that I look back, I didn't do anything but destroy myself for about two years.
After a couple years have passed I decided to enter culinary school and during this time suffered a serious over-dose and managed to survive. I think this was a wake up call to me that if I didn't stop abusing I was going to end up dead. I cut out my usage slowly, graduated culinary school and during my time working in the restaurant industry actually quite using all together. I even ended up seeing a therapist (talk therapy) for about 6 months toward the end of my culinary training, where I was diagnosed with the severe PTSD and depression.
I am currently back in school working on my business degree, on the Deans List, taking my general ed classes and getting ready to transfer within the year.
That is a little backstory on my past situation and roughly where I am at now. Where am I at now with my PTSD? I'm not sure, I am 24 now so I have had it for about 5 years now. As explained to me by my overpriced therapist, PTSD is like a roller coaster, you have your ups and downs. It seems like last semester my mind was very positive, happy and I actually felt like I was ok. For some reason this semester I feel angry, depressed, cynical and tired. I am unsure as to why this is, it bothers me.
I suppose I would like to speak with people that could help me understand how to cope with negative feelings like these. It would also be great to speak with other veterans also diagnosed with PTSD, as well as older veterans who have more experience in dealing with their own PTSD. I have a ton of questions and I have already written a book here so I will ask more later, but this is me in a nutshell and I hope to share more details with you all later as well as learn about you.
On a closing note, I would like to add that I no longer use "hard" substances, but I like to occasionally smoke pot which is another issue that I would like to hear about: is it a pro or a con? I have heard both sides, maybe you could fill me in on your opinions?
Thanks for reading! :Hug_emoticon:
A little about myself: I joined the Marine Corps at 18 and was sent to Iraq at 19 in 2004. I came back from my tour in Iraq and looking back now my symptoms were quite evident as soon as I returned to the States. This, of course, included things from hyper-sensitivity to the atmosphere around me, self destructive acts and substance abuse.
The substance abuse actually caused me to fail a drug test while in the military and caused an early seperation with an "other than honorable" discharge. I didn't enjoy the military at all so the seperation was actually welcomed by me with open arms, however, the next couple of years to come were not so positive. My substance abuse became worse and worse (to explain my degree of abuse, the list of what I wasn't using was a lot shorter than what I was using) and became more daily than recreational. On top of this, my other symptoms were horrible and I was suffering from some serious internal pain and anger. Now that I look back, I didn't do anything but destroy myself for about two years.
After a couple years have passed I decided to enter culinary school and during this time suffered a serious over-dose and managed to survive. I think this was a wake up call to me that if I didn't stop abusing I was going to end up dead. I cut out my usage slowly, graduated culinary school and during my time working in the restaurant industry actually quite using all together. I even ended up seeing a therapist (talk therapy) for about 6 months toward the end of my culinary training, where I was diagnosed with the severe PTSD and depression.
I am currently back in school working on my business degree, on the Deans List, taking my general ed classes and getting ready to transfer within the year.
That is a little backstory on my past situation and roughly where I am at now. Where am I at now with my PTSD? I'm not sure, I am 24 now so I have had it for about 5 years now. As explained to me by my overpriced therapist, PTSD is like a roller coaster, you have your ups and downs. It seems like last semester my mind was very positive, happy and I actually felt like I was ok. For some reason this semester I feel angry, depressed, cynical and tired. I am unsure as to why this is, it bothers me.
I suppose I would like to speak with people that could help me understand how to cope with negative feelings like these. It would also be great to speak with other veterans also diagnosed with PTSD, as well as older veterans who have more experience in dealing with their own PTSD. I have a ton of questions and I have already written a book here so I will ask more later, but this is me in a nutshell and I hope to share more details with you all later as well as learn about you.
On a closing note, I would like to add that I no longer use "hard" substances, but I like to occasionally smoke pot which is another issue that I would like to hear about: is it a pro or a con? I have heard both sides, maybe you could fill me in on your opinions?
Thanks for reading! :Hug_emoticon:
