Sexual Trauma But Not Sexual Abuse?

[Obin]

Did the adult that did this undergo a similar experience when they were the same age as you?

No, not that I'm aware of.

 

[Curip]

There's no need for a 10 year old to be taught how to use tampons, even if asked, and certainly the adult should have stopped at the first sign of distress. I'd still call it sexual abuse I'm afraid.

 

[JoJo11]

There's no need for a 10 year old to be taught how to use tampons, even if asked, and certainly the adult should have st...

Interesting. I don't know what to think of this or how I should feel about it.

 

[Ucop]

To be most frank, this was how I was trained to use tampons.

The adult, I'm fairly certain, had nothing to gain by doing this and was not doing it with the intention of punitive abuse or self gratification.

I'd have to disagree with this either being sexual abuse, or sexual trauma. Despite it involving sex organs, there was nothing sexual about it. Similar a breast cut in half by a seatbelt during a vehicle accident, or a child being taught to pull their foreskin back to clean themselves by a parent who doesn't know they're attached to the glans; if there was no sexual or abusive intent? Then despite the area of the body involved, it wasn't sexual, or abusive. Which doesn't mean there was no harm. But a lot of things cause pain or physical damage, without being abuse.

 

[Omuh]

To be most frank, this was how I was trained to use tampons.

I was,12.5 and not trained. I was told.

 

[Efeb]

To be most frank, this was how I was trained to use tampons.

Ok if this in relation to tampons then most likely it wasn't abuse as much as not smart

 

[Uka]

To be most frank, this was how I was trained to use tampons.

Definitely sexual abuse. It just is and it DEFINITELY should not have been painful.

 

[Igis]

Also there's NO REASON an honest attempt at educating you should've happened more than once.

 

[Olezi]

There's no need for a 10 year old to be taught how to use tampons, even if asked,

I used tampons from the age of 9.

I think I was about 14 before I realized you're not supped to use the plunger before it's all the way inserted :facepalm: (yowch!) But aside from that minor snafu, no worries. Not being able or allowed to use tampons would have meant giving up my sports. Loooooooove tampons! They're a big part of why I don't hate being a girl. And I definitely started to before my mom caved and let me use them.

it DEFINITELY should not have been painful.

It was painful for me before I learned to use them correctly. Like I said above, yowch! About at the level of a skinned knee. Delicate tissue, there!

I didn't have a hymen, however. For girls women who still have a hymen that doesn't retract during menses? Or has a hymen with multiple perforations and they're trying to insert through a perforation? Tampons can be rough.

 

[Kevun]

New Also there's NO REASON an honest attempt at educating you should've happened more than once.

Unless the OP is as stupid as I am. I had to have my mom show me about a dozen times over the years and I still didn't 'get it'. Don't even get me started on the little wiggle needed by the pubic bone. >.< It was like angels of angles singing on high once I finally got the "do not plunge until all the way inserted" AND "When it bumps your pubic bone, it's not all the way inserted. Wiggle around it. There's more room. A LOT more room."

Now, I don't know the OP, and their adult could have been an pedophile & abusive monster that needs to rot in the 9th circle of hell for all eternity. But I'm hardly the only chick on the planet who didn't understand how tampons are best used for a few years.

 

[JoJo11]

It wouldn't go in and was being forced in against the "closed gates" (muscles pretty much entirely clamped down) for a duration of maybe 30 mins by the adult with profuse crying and significant pain involved on my end.

 

[Abahu]

I'm going to have to agree with some of the women here relating their stories of how to use tampons in the beginning. Now, the fact that the op has come to a trauma forum could indicate that the event(s) were more sexually traumatic than we can know at this point. However, I would not - from what has been described - immediately label this sexual abuse just because genitals were involved. In all likelihood this person was a family member, comfortable enough around the child (and the other way around) to think they could safely help them learn the procedure. The fact that it hurt and the person didn't stop, well, from my own experience, even inserting them myself in the beginning was not painless.

Long story short, do you feel like the event traumatized you to a point to have to seek treatment?