So Stressted

[starry-night]

I'm being made redundant from my job.

It's a job that I love, in a safe place, with safe people (for the very most part). I've worked there for over 8 years now.

I'm not coping well. I'm finding filling in the forms very stressful. I'm beginning to get really depressed, because I can't even seem to get an interview. I'm getting freaked out at having to start from scratch, having to suss people out, work out the dynamics of what's going on. Work out who is 'safe' and who might cause me damage.

Everyone is so upbeat and positive. I don't share any of that. I want to scream when people start with the positive statements.

 

[ronin47]

Are you looking for a new job because you don't feel like you're useful in your current job? I'm not sure I follow you.

 

[starry-night]

The place where I work is being closed :(

 

[starry-night]

Not had a good day today. Spent about 2 hours in floods of tears in the office of my boss.

 

[ProductOfSociety]

I am sorry about your place of work closing. Try and stay positive.
I know the hardest part about finding a new job for me is becoming comfortable at that new work place. It took me 6 months to be comfortable where I work now, and the people are nice but I'd really rather work some place else but it's just such a hassle to get a new job.
I hope things go well for you. I hope that you are able to find a job that you enjoy as much as your current one or maybe even more. Don't let it get you down. As hard as it may be right now, just try and stay positive. <3

 

[Spero3]

Starry-night,

I am very sorry to hear about your job. I have huge fear issues around employment (even though I'm only employed part-time right now). The thought of starting a new job, and that I might fail, are huge concerns for me. I know this is very hard. Would your boss be willing to help you make some connections at other businesses? Do they offer some work placement assistance? I don't know what you area of specialty is, or where you work, so these may not be viable options. But, it can't hurt to ask.

Spero

 

[BlueKitty]

Everyone is so upbeat and positive. I don't share any of that. I want to scream when people start with the positive statements.

Yup. I feel you. Everyone around me seems so happy and positive, enjoying their life, too. And that makes me realize/feel complete isolation and deepening loneliness with no floor to hit.

I am very sorry to hear about your job:( but. you loved it. I am sure you were good at it too. It may take some time to find a new job and get adjusted too... with "is it sticky patch or a double-dip meltdown" situation (if you are from the US).
With time, I am sure you will find another job you can feel safe at :) *hugs* if it's ok.

Meanwhile, definitely do check if you can get some work placement assistance and unemployment benefits like spero suggested.

Best Wishes Starry-night :)

 

[starry-night]

Thank you for taking time to read and reply. I really appreciate that.

So I ended up at the doctor's this afternoon. Emergency appointment. I now have beta blockers, diazepam and sleeping tablets.

The doctors in that practise are amazing. She spent a lot of time with me. Asked about my coping mechanisms. I thought she would rap me on the knuckles for what I said, but she was very understanding. I was very touched that she had read my notes before I went in.