So They Call Again To Try The 'family Reunion'...

[Srain]

AGAIN!!?!?!

Unbelievable....I'm so ripped up inside and hurt the words are difficult to type :cry:

My Sister IL called, I love her and haven't heard from her all Summer, I miss her horribly but knew she was busy. It was odd she called but she was talking very fast and let me know they were moving, bought a house, yada yada yada, finally started to bring my mother into it...yeah yeah... her birthday just passed...I sent a generic card..of course duly noted my mother pointedly MISSED my husband's birthday (bitch!!! he is the sweetest man who, btw insists on paying for your phone despite my position on it!!!)

She gets around to that my older brother had called my mother (unheard of!!! It's been 30yrs) and they had spoken for a few hours...so it's done! She has FINALLY gone completely over to the "let's pretend" ....I know exactly where she stands...any dealings with me will be brittle...I won't be apart of it but wait!!! Here it comes, the "family reunion", complete with "we'll all be so sorry when she isn't here anymore", ummmm, NOT ME!! I've done my time which is lightyears more than ANY OF YOU!!!

I told her that it seems my brother holds the children hostage if I don't agree to be apart if she is there. The truth is I have spent more time than all of you have ever spent with her. My whole left has been with her while you all have been where??? Not with her, I've been with her. I would love to see the kids and you, I love you. I've done my time...missing one moment won't make me regret anything.

So I said how I felt and immediately the deal was off .....she politely began how they were going to be so very very busy this year blah blah blah....REALLY!!!! THIS IS THE GAME STILL???? I'm out....

ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

 

[Blondie362]

Oh how I can relate to you on this one (((((((hugs)))))))))) the old emotional blackmail card being placed - do what is best for your recovery and don't let anyone give you that " you;ll be sorry crap" ........

Many have lived with guilt for years, and hopefully as we go through the steps of therapy we gain strength and insight.

My MIL was the bitch from hell and gave me verbal abuse, I took it for years and you know what, in the end after being told " life is too short " .. I also thought yes and life is too short to take this sh*t from people too... and some times you just have to remove yourself form a situation that is so false.

My husbands family all hate each other but it was MIL's wishes to have a "reunion" , all happy smiley and hypocritical.. why pretend ? all the siblings and in laws dont like MIL- she is pure evil and got her kicks from playing one member off against the other, and really did some shitty things to every one of us- they all went for this meal, - I didn't , I couldn't imagine spending one minute in a ball of hypocrisy - even the MIL told the in laws " i dont know why you bothered coming" - you arn't blood! .. so glad I didn't go, I would have flipped

She is now 94 and in a nursing home and still is horrible to members who visit out of duty not love, so even now she's bitter and twisted, and I can't be around people like that.- as they say misery loves company, and thats all she's got in the end - misery.

I did more for my MIL then any of her " blood family" yet was at the end of her viciousness for more years than I care to remember, so I just bowed out.

Her tongue is so sharp she will cut her own throat, and there isn't anything I can do about that- only stay away from it.

Stick by your convictions for your own sanity.

 

[Muzikluvr]

Freedom from hypocrisy?.... PRICELESS :D

 

[mamachick]

Rain you see right through it-agree with Blondie, do what is best for you. For me, living in crazy family has led me to putting a wall around my heart at times. Im aware of it and have tried to bring it down to be more feeling and less thinking. ( my thinking comes from the brain or the heart-integrating the 2 are at times hard for me) When it comes to family, I should always listen to the brain. Its that sympathy that paves a road to hell for me.

I dont know the background but I take it you have had contact with sister but avoid other family? I am sorry this is happening in your life and how disruptive it can be. I know you have traveled a long road to see this with the clarity that you have. You have the freedom to chose, your life is the canvas, and you hold the power to design as you like.

Hugs