Sexual Assault Some People.....

[nay.elizabeth]

I was going through some threads, hoping for some commonalities. Quite a few were found and I haven't even dug that deep!

Someone mentioned an ex boyfriend making stupid comments. I laughed to myself as I recalled a friend I had for about 15 years, give or take.

I was drug-induced raped in 2009. The scumbag gave me Genital Herpes.

This friend, we shall call him "A", knew of my rape, not of my virus. (Why would that factor matter?)

He was going to be in town and wanted to meet up for some... Uh...adult happenings. He's married so I said no. He said his marriage doesn't matter and continued to push the idea. I said no again, he argued. I finally confessed my virus and he immediately called me diseased and that what happened wasn't my fault but the fact I didn't get help from the hospital or police is my own fault. I'm crying in the grocery store as we have this conversation and he's 100% heartless and dumb.

I told him off, followed with a good riddance. Never let ANYONE shame you for being attacked. Never allow someone to say it was your fault, no matter who they are and how long or well you have known them.

Stupidity and ignorance should not be tolerated. Ever, ever. Male or female, you don't deserve someone to shame you for something you had no control of.

 

[InvisibleSun]

So proud of you for your strength and courage..this really inspired me! Thanks to rape culture, we live in a world where people have been taught to blame the victim, which forces them into silence, and consequently perpetuates this vicious cycle of sexual abuse. Congrats on not feeling shame for the atrocity committed upon you...I have struggled with shame for many, many years now.. you give me hope.

All in all, though, this guy seems like an asshole. Way to stick it to him. ;)

 

[nay.elizabeth]

So proud of you for your strength and courage..this really inspired me! Thanks to rape culture, we...

I have tiny moments of being ashamed but not because of the rape, but more because of the virus. I've accepted it...all I can do is take care of myself and accept there's nothing I can do.

I am sorry you battle shame! It's a tough thing to go through...and no two people will ever deal with it the same (that itself can be tough to deal with). The moments of feeling disgusting, dirty, being "unable to wash it out of your skin" will sometimes just be there but all we can do is push through it. You are still a human being, you are still fabulous and incredible and awesome.

It can be tough to let people go from life that have been there for years but don't EVER let ANYONE tell you how to feel, how to handle your situations, or say bad things that happen to you are your fault. It's better to have a few people in your life than to have those who shame you or belittle you. You deserve happiness, even if your mind won't agree some days.