Staying Positive
How hard do you find it to stay positive when there no one around to back you up?
Anthony, we spoke yesterday briefly about Timor, and other things going on in my life. I agreed with you about my relationship saga, but now after one of the worst nights I have had in a long time, I think that is only part.
Anne, my counsellor/therapist used an analogy which I find pretty cool, but also pretty disgusting.
She said that during my alcohol and substance abuse and when I don't want to deal with certain things, I hide it. She said its like I hide it behind a big horrible scab on a wound. But every now and then 'triggers' are like bumping that scab which causes it to weep and gives you pain.
Now she said is my time to face up, and tear that whole scab off and clean out what is underneath so it can heal.
Well I think after what we talked about and my therapy the other day, the surface has cracked that scab and I am feeling it. It is a positive step forward,as I am now dealing with it, but have no escape. as my mind is twisting and turning and I only slept for about two hours last night despite taking sleeping medication.
I went to my G/F's place yesterday with a copy of that document and tried to talk to her, but was constantly interrupted by her teenager, so I just clammed up. He is only 13 and she asked him to go away and he just ignored her. I almost said something which would have only been for the worse. So I am going to tackle it another way. I have written her a letter explaining things and also included a copy of that document. What do you think?
As for my other issues at the moment. I am feeling really badly depressed at the moment, hence the other bodily issues are rearing their heads, such as IBS, OCD, bruxism, and the insomnia.
On a positive note, I joined a ten pin league last night, it starts Wednesday, and have the animal shelter orientation next Saturday. Might have to buy a boat though.
So I am refusing to let these things keep me down, but its so hard to remain positive when you have no lifeline around to grab.
:confused:
How hard do you find it to stay positive when there no one around to back you up?
Anthony, we spoke yesterday briefly about Timor, and other things going on in my life. I agreed with you about my relationship saga, but now after one of the worst nights I have had in a long time, I think that is only part.
Anne, my counsellor/therapist used an analogy which I find pretty cool, but also pretty disgusting.
She said that during my alcohol and substance abuse and when I don't want to deal with certain things, I hide it. She said its like I hide it behind a big horrible scab on a wound. But every now and then 'triggers' are like bumping that scab which causes it to weep and gives you pain.
Now she said is my time to face up, and tear that whole scab off and clean out what is underneath so it can heal.
Well I think after what we talked about and my therapy the other day, the surface has cracked that scab and I am feeling it. It is a positive step forward,as I am now dealing with it, but have no escape. as my mind is twisting and turning and I only slept for about two hours last night despite taking sleeping medication.
I went to my G/F's place yesterday with a copy of that document and tried to talk to her, but was constantly interrupted by her teenager, so I just clammed up. He is only 13 and she asked him to go away and he just ignored her. I almost said something which would have only been for the worse. So I am going to tackle it another way. I have written her a letter explaining things and also included a copy of that document. What do you think?
As for my other issues at the moment. I am feeling really badly depressed at the moment, hence the other bodily issues are rearing their heads, such as IBS, OCD, bruxism, and the insomnia.
On a positive note, I joined a ten pin league last night, it starts Wednesday, and have the animal shelter orientation next Saturday. Might have to buy a boat though.
So I am refusing to let these things keep me down, but its so hard to remain positive when you have no lifeline around to grab.
:confused:
