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Struggling

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fuzzypenguin

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My boyfriend and I are opposites when it comes to sex. His sex drive is higher than mine. It's getting worse too. Weeks after the assault, it was bad (flashbacks) but currently it's just I have no motivation to do anything. I'm not sure if it's related to the assault (I'm sure it is a little bit) or just me. Either way, it's hurting our relationship and overall I'm worried and scared. I can't lose him. He's the best thing that's ever been in my life. He supports and cares about me so strongly. I'm just worried my sex drive will continue down this path or decline worse. I'm working on it, but I don't think it's going very well.
 
I have the same problem. I get flashbacks galore if I don't have a couple glasses of wine first. It's pathetic. My therapist thinks there's nothing wrong with this, as a lot of couples have wine with sex, but I need it or I WILL have flashbacks. She still thinks that's okay. I would be satisfied to never have sex again, but my husband is trying -- he has had problems since prostate cancer. Anyway, that doesn't mean anything in your situation. I don't know what to recommend, dear, except that you have to be comfortable with whatever happens. I know you don't want to lose your guy. I wish I could wave a magic wand for you . . .. :hug:s
 
@hodge, sounds like you need a new therapist. Yours has no clue about trauma, healthy sex, or addictions.
 
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