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Suicidal Family Member

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CoalStars

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I have a family member who has had a really rough life, and now they're getting older and a bunch of chronic pain is setting in, in addition to the rough times theyve had. Lately they've been saying some really alarming things like "Im done with this world" and "Im ready for this life to be over." Im lost. What do I do? I've had to stop them from killing themself once already, about 6 years ago. I feel like the weight of the world is pressing me down. How can I ever help this person? Ive tried suggesting therapy and offered to go to some pain doctors with them. I myself suffer from depression and anxiety and PTSD and i have very little energy for them, but I want--no, i NEED to help them.

What can i do? what's right to do? I don't want to mess up and then regret not helping more for the rest of my life.

Please help. Any advice or comment or anything, please.
 
What does their own support system look like? Do they have therapists/good relationship with GP/other family/friends?

There really is only so much you can do to be honest. How old are they? I ask only because a 60yo and a 90yo saying they're ready for life to be over tends to be pretty different.

Do you have support for yourself? Caring for someone else is always a lot to take on.
 
Do you have a suicide call back line or mental health team that you can ring in your country? This could give you an idea of resources available or ideas and strategies possible for your family member.
 
She's 60, no good friends to talk to or family members she's close to. She tried therapy once and had a bad experience so she doesn't want to try that again, but I keep gently nudging her towards therapy anyways. She doesn't have a good doctor either, that's why her chronic pain isn't getting any better and she feels so hopeless about it.

I have a very small and fragile support system for myself right now, but I do have a therapist I can go see if I need more support.

Thanks for the suggestion about a suicide help line, that's a good one to add to the list of things to keep in mind
 
I would suggest that you going to therapy @CoalStars to get more support would be a great idea, and that way you can work out some ideas for this family member as well. This would give you an opportunity to work out your boundaries around supporting your family member.

Is your family member a reader? If so, buying them a copy of David Burns' "Feeling Good" could be most useful it they were predisposed to reading it.
 
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