Supporter Just Venting

[Decita]

So today makes two weeks since my combat vet shut me out. I had posted previously that we were gonna take a big step forward and then he's gone. His friend did tell me he's alive.

However I've never had him go two weeks not speaking to me. I think it's been particularly rough this isolation because since he seemed so adamant to start looking "down the road" and "making plans" as he said and then completely shutting me out I've taken it harder.

The point in this post is I've struggled more than normal this time. I love my vet very much and he's helped me grow into who I am today. I've been out in public and a few men have flirted/asked me out/got in my personal space and I began hyperventilating. I started shaking almost in panic. Couldn't get away quick enough. I kept thinking in my head that I can't let anyone hurt me, I can't let anyone hurt me. I was like a human in a cage with a hungry tiger trying to get away.

My heart belongs to my vet and my loyalty still lies with him but it was just that perception of how panicked I felt when men were trying to get close to me and how I panicked and threw up my defenses that made me wonder what he goes through trying to be close to me. Anyways just something I've thought about.

 

[Jukun]

Think that it is great you acknowledge the feelings you have. Over time those feelings become less severe, and you will feel less threatened. But it takes examining those emotions closely. I can go out and be around men but l recognize l have trust issues but men don't trigger me as they first did.

 

[Ilej]

I was just going to start a similar thread. I'm being shut out too, but he told me. A few years ago he made all kinds of plans for us but backed out of them. Now we are much more casual. We live very separate lives. A recent situation in his life triggered this shut out. He didn't tell me it was coming, but I knew it would come sooner or later. So when I texted him the other day, I wasn't totally shocked when he said he's depressed and doesn't want to talk to anyone. But it's still hard. I try to tell myself he let me know where his head is at and he probably didn't even want to do that. When he says he feels that bad I want to comfort him but can't. It's really hard to go against my instincts. I thought it would get easier with time but it doesn't. He basically told me it's not personal but of course it feels personal *sigh*

 

[Buci]

I hear you. Im new here, but it feels like a lifeline. My guy has ptsd and tbi. Things were closer and deeper. We've known each other forever. This my first shut out..its been 2 weeks of nothing. so hard.

 

[Gelis]

Hello and I'm sorry to hear that. Yesterday made 4 weeks for me. This is the longest in the entire 4 years I've known him. It hurts and I'm dealing day to day. Hugs to you :)

 

[Amow]

Yesterday was 4 weeks for me. I have known him forever. I would wait forever. I just wish i knew something about what he wanted. I would never pressure him. These formums help so much...

 

[Ropabe]

Yesterday was 4 weeks for me. I have known him forever. I would wait forever. I just wish i knew something about what he...

Sorry..im logged in..im actually SummerGirl

 

[Wisuwa]

im actually SummerGirl

This is the anonymous forum, so all posts are automatically assigned a random name.