Sufferer Survived The Westgate Siege

[BinnyKE]

The Westgate Siege happened just over 7 weeks ago in Nairobi. The first week was hell of course, and I was doing so much better after. I went through counseling and group therapy as well.

But for the past few days, I feel angry for no reason. Irritated. Alone. Disconnected. I start crying at any time, anywhere for no reason. I keep getting flash backs as well.

I had a fantastic Saturday morning, I went shopping, at another mall. But all I could feel at the same time was fear. Immense fear. Looking out for the nearest exit. If something were to happen, where would I hide. I've also started distancing myself from people close to me as well. I know it's normal to feel this way. But what's frustrating me is that I was fine after counseling. I collapsed the situation. I snapped out being stuck in the story. But I can't understand what this is now.

 

[intothelight]

Hi BinnyKE,

Welcome to MyPTSD forum!

With PTSD it is pretty normal to experience an increase in symptoms after being triggered. Exposure therapy can help reduce the impact of the trigger and the symptoms. There are several threads/posts about this on the site.

I hope you find the information and support here beneficial to your healing.

Take care.

Debbie

 

[nomedic1]

Welcome

 

[Abstract]

Are you still in treatment Binny? I hope you are. As Intothelight said the triggers can come unexpectedly. Sorry that you experienced such an awful situation.

 

[Stanley Shi-Yume]

It's quite volatile how our minds go automatically into protective maneuvers. I was never even aware it was happening, for 8 years or more...

When you observe how automatic this is, and then feel beyond control of you.. it is the deepest frustration possible for us to experience.

One of the best remedies is communication. You can't communicate what you don't observe. Can't share detail that hasn't been captured. this is why the internal, self only feedback loop can end up so blind and oblivious to these patterns.

So the first step is looking. You're doing that now, so keep at it. Share what you learn. That's how we resist the isolated, alone state of self that comes from our pure instinct.

It's a fascinating shift from the typical instinct "I must fit in to survive" to "I only survive for myself". I am astonished by this