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T suggested group for 8 weeks

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Charmd1

Confident
So my T has asked if I would join a trauma group. The sessions run 8 weeks starting in January. I would miss 10 hours of work a week which in a single income family household that’s a big thing.
I have always avoided groups. It feels like airing dirty laundry.

Please tell me your thoughts or experiences
Because I don’t know if this is a good fit.
 
One, these things, groups are hard to come by. Fear of going is very typical, normal thinking, until you actually go, committ, you don’t know if your fears are founded. I agreed to a group for anxiety, depression. Not my thing, but all that was available. I stuck it out for the 8 weeks and got many pearls from it. I wished after that it could continue. We actually were not able to air much, it was a learning tool. Well taught, but it helped. Also I was in a group where it was easy for me to look around and see that we a we were all suffering in our own way, even though stories were not shared much. It gave me the needed sense that I was not the only one, I was not alone in these struggles.
 
So my T has asked if I would join a trauma group. The sessions run 8 weeks starting in January. I would miss 10 hours of work a week which in a single income family household that’s a big thing.

I have always avoided groups. It feels like airing dirty laundry.

Please tell me your thoughts or experiences
Because I don’t know if this is a good fit.
I have CPTSD. I was in a women's group for a yr. For me,it was too intense,I was triggered all the time while in it. It was however a positive experience cause you always learn something. I am in EMDR therapy for 5 yrs now. I would work on learning to control my emotion regulations. Using a container to place your feeling in ,in-between sessions. Get into yoga,mindfulness to help you
 
I was in a PTSD group twice. One was led by a therapist, the other by an off duty therapist. Both times I was triggered badly and could not go back. I'm able to handle triggers much better now and would probably benefit from a group experience. I think it depends on how reactive you are.
 
I wouldn't be where I am without all the group therapy I've done - trauma-focused and broader base.

IME whether or not the group is valuable comes down to the skill of the person running the group. Trauma-focused groups (IME) in particular needed clear boundaries, consistently enforced.

Group and individual therapies both have their place in recovery. If your T has recommended a specific group, I'd give it a try. At the same time, it's rarely an urgent thing - groups that only run for a certain number of weeks tend to be offered on a cycle.
 
I’ve had amazing group stuff, and terrible group stuff.

Amazing as in life changing. Brilliant people. Strength. Courage. Laughter. Life.

Terrible as in I threw a chair through a stained glass window, after lashing out at another person in the group, and not only walking out, but leaving the country (and my flat/boyfriend/job/etc. without a word.). As in I snarled at the idiot next to me, threw the chair, and stormed out… of my life.

Clearly the difference? Was me.

If I’d been less reactive? I’d have just rolled my eyes and cancelled my involvement with the too stupid for words group, and gone about my life just as I had before.

I was in a difficult place.

And it was the wrong group for someone like me.

I was in a worse place, when I found an amazing group.

I’m not a “group” person. In both instances it was others who sent/pushed me towards them. On pain of losing them, kind of thing. So I sucked it up. With the shite group, to bad outcome. With the amaxing group to… interesting outcome.

Because I don’t know if this is a good fit.
No way to know, without trying it.

I would miss 10 hours of work a week which in a single income family household that’s a big thing.
This is a totally good/valid reason not to try it. Unless money is no object.
 
T offered me the group idea several times over the years. My answer was always a flat Hell. No.
The last thing I wanted was to sit around and whine with a bunch of people playing "my trauma was bigger"
Ya, that's kind what I thought they were all about 😁
And, because it was an unknown, I wasn't about to spend sick leave hours on it.

Then I found this place, which T said she would accept as "group therapy" and I found my people.
After a long while of being supported here I got brave enough to actually go to one IRL - and I'm shocked at how much it helped.

If it's only 8 weeks you can give it a try and see if you like it. If it works, great. If not, if it's not a good fit, or you don't feel like you belong or its the wrong topics you can always leave. Maybe not thru a hole in a stained glass window ala @Friday LOL, but walking out the front door because you know it's not the right fit for you at this time Doesn't mean you can't come back and try again later, just means it's not good for you now.

Don't think of it as being forced to talk or forced to attend or any of that nonsense.
You don't have to defend not wanting to go.
You don't have to defend wanting to go

Think of it as just trying different avenues to find a group you can connect with because when it clicks, when you find that group of people who just get it, it can be amazing.
 
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