Terrifying Therapist Questions

[Sandstone]

(Which I think has an obvious answer).

Which one? I think it has an obvious answer too, but it isn't the same as Freida's obvious answer.

Perhaps your T wants to know your answer.

 

[MyWillow]

First thing my psydoc (main T) asked me:

“How does it feel to be here?”

I nearly dissociated on the spot. Whatever happened to “how are you?” Hahahahaha “I’m fine.”

She’s good. Very good. Her questions and observations are so spot on. “Did your tears surprise you?” is another one because often I feel like my body is overriding my rational brain. I don’t even realise tears are streaming.

And she’s blunt but kind. There are no “expected” answers. Often I’m confused. But her questions generate spontaneity and deep down honesty.

 

[Skywatcher]

My t has been asking me these same questions for 4 years. Yep - years. She says we will know we are done when I can finally answer them. Just last week she reminded me that if I let myself cry in her office chances are high that I WONT end up catatonic in the corner. And I still don't believe her. Did I mention 4 years? :laugh:

It might help to see these questions as topics of conversation rather than things that demand an answer. The idea is to get you to think outside of your usual automatic thinking. So "Its not safe to cry" becomes "huh, I wonder why I'm afraid to cry"

Does that make sense?

I did explain to her why it’s not okay. She even completed my sentence with “because if you cry, it can just become so much worse.” In more present situations, crying brings on the social isolation. This is why she recommended I try it there. Thing is, I cried in there once. The day she took away email responses. It became a huge abandonment trigger and I completely lost control. And now we are working on those feelings, but I just put them away. I even wrote poems that truly represent my feelings while at home, crying the whole time as I write, then I get to therapy and turn into a robot.