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Deleted member 44240
I've been such a support to my former sufferer. He called me his professional mentor at one time because I helped him get out of a slump about a year back when he was about to leave the professiona we share. I got him new employment and he was so happy and so appreciative and I was happy to do it for him. I found him so very attractive and charming that I just had to be with him, so we started dating. Keep in mind that I'm 16 years his senior and we celebrated his 36 birthday this year. We enjoyed each other's company and kept each other inspired and excited about not only what we did as a profession, but also on a personal level. Whatever he needed or whenever he needed me, I was there no matter what i.e. sickness, sadness, family issues, professional issues (he lost his job in April) financial challenges ( there when he needed me). So advance to August, He moved in with me July 31 and this was after a seven month whirlwind of dating. I lost my job on August 12 which really swept the rug out from under me both mentally and emotionally so I really needed his emotional support ( not knowing that it may have been the wrong request at the time). I also had a few minor relationship requests that was very minor and could have been handled in a very positive way. I'll never forget the day he left, the week leading up to it he was very weird acting, very disconnected. On Wednesday he said he wanted to break up because things were becoming too much for him with school and everything (me requesting too much for our relationship). He acted like I was someone he didn't know anymore. That Friday, August 18, he acted as if he was going to school and I had some things to do as well so I left home to do a few things as well. Later in the morning I spoke with him and he asked where I was ( which was strange, but now I get it ) I told him I was just handling the day and that I would see him later on, he said, "ok". When I reached home he had left the key wrapped up in a receipt sitting on my door knob, so when I went inside he had notes of me cheating and he had zero tolerance for that, he had moved all of his things out which was extremely discouraging and very upsetting. After some time, we spoke and I basically pleaded with him to return and asked why in the world would you leave now of all times, I relied on his emotional support and physical presence to keep my momentum up. He said that he didn't think we were compatible any longer ( huh )? I can't really explain how at that moment I lost my mind, brain started to hurt, heart started to palpitate, stomach became quesi. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. After all we had been through? Since then we have been in touch several times and he's even tried to help me with things I needed help with, and when I saw him, he's treated me like I really mattered and he wanted the best for me, he also told me that he loves me, but we have too much on our plates to be concerned with our relationship and that we could be friends and move at a slower pace to get back to where we were. I want to give him the necessary space needed for him to feel better about everything and to make sure he feels comfortable with me and trust me. I never knew what to endure or how to deal with it when it happened because I wasn't educated at the time, but this forum and several articles later, I'm prepared for moving forward. If anyone has words to share concerning this baffling situation, please do. Keep in mind, I've been a supporter ( as good as I could at the time ) and an extremely good person and I'm now at a lost for what to expect next.
