Even if you reacted quickly, and didn't take time to think things through, your reaction is understandable. I'm also not sure if you have done the level of damage you feel like you have done.
Give others a little bit of credit here... If someone posts information publicly, and it's upsetting and alarming, especially if it is about a public figure lying to the general public and apologizing for it, then it is likely that more than one person will pass on that public information to the news media. Give reporters a little credit. I used to be one and I remain friends with one. I know it's really hard to give them any credit - they screw up sometimes. However, they get angry emails and messages about public figures
all the time. It's really quite amazing how much stuff that gets emailed to reporters. Seriously. News media outlets tend to not take it very seriously because SO MUCH comes in.
If these reporters are interested in what you emailed them, then they will let you know and they will check to see if what you said was true or not. If they do not check any information you gave them, but print stories only off an angry emails from one person, then they are completely crap reporters and any misinformation they print is ON THEM. Not you. Yeah, I know the news media prints mis-information all the time, oh boy do I ever know... but, they rarely do it because of some angry emails from one person about a well known public figure. What they do is they take the emails and they check it out.
I just checked my messages. She responded that he was deployed and not to believe everything I read. She is the one that posted that he was not deployed. Here are her exact words she posted:
"Not that it makes it any better or worse, but my husband wasn't deployed and isn't even in the military anymore. There have been a lot of misconceptions about that."
This would make one think that he has never been in combat.
Being "deployed" only means being sent out on active duty. I have friends who get deployed with the national guard to non-combat situations, and my cousin was deployed to a non-combat place in the navy. It is still called deployment. It is my understanding that someone is either on a base near their home at the time, or they are deployed. It's not about combat status. (Perhaps a military expert can chime in though and correct me if I am wrong.)
The only legit explanation that I can think of for her conflicting statements is that US. Military members have been told that neither they nor their family should post about their military status online. No photos, no information about being a military member, ect. One of the concerns is that terrorists will figure out who the military
member is connected to and their home addresses and harm their family or friends. ISIS has issued videos threatening our military
members at home. The fact that she is posting or emailing anything at all about her husbands military status in connection with her real name is absolutely foolish on her part. Especially when she is creating all this drama around it and when she has other drama around the accusations of cheating on her husband.
She needs to give no more comment, not on email, not on facebook, to anyone, about all this mess. She needs to be talking to a therapist and private help. She needs to let it all die down. If there is any safety risk to her or her family, maybe she has someone from the military
advising them to stop. Just stop all the Facebooking
about his military
status. If she is still telling people anything, then that tells me that there isn't a specific safety threat and/or she is being foolish and trying to draw people into her drama and have them run circles in their heads.
She may be lying for a good purpose... but she is going about all of it in a really illogical and drama inducing way.
She may also just be creating drama. And you got drawn in. It sounds like many other people did too. It's understandable and doesn't make you a bad person. My guess is that this is not about safety at all. If she is accused of cheating on her husband, then it sounds like she has some serious stress she needs to be dealing with privately
. Not on facebook or in front of all the public. That's the totally wrong way to handle all of this on her part. She is being foolish and stupid.
It sounds like she set out bait and many people got hooked up in her lies. I don't blame you at all for your actions. They sound wise. Now it's time to do what you very smartly are realizing - take a step back and disconnect from it all.
She should not be emailing you or other members of the general public about her husbands military status.
This is her crazy out of control behavior. Not yours. She may be actually trying to pull you in emotionally and get a reaction from you.
I think you have taken a good step to cut off communication with her.
What specific damage do think will come about if there was some kind of investigation into your emails between you and her? She is likely telling others the same circling stories that she is telling you. Don't take on blame for it. Give that back to her and let her go.
In general, it is best to avoid email about anything controversial, especially with public figures. In general, email is not a secure private form of communication, even though most people think it is. It generally should be handled like it is more or less public communication. So in general, it is a very wise step to probably hold off on any further emailing. If you two would really like to connect, then either of you can suggest a phone call. But emailing about military
status is really not a good idea, no matter what the truth is. She is the one who should know that most of all. Not you. You did the right thing. 
