General To Anyone In Despair From The Toll This Awful Condition Can Take.....

[wife of]

Hang in there...


A year ago my darling man was in a psych intensive care ward. Daily he struggled against the staff to try to leave the planet whilst having moments of clarity. At all other times he was either sedated and asleep or stuck in long (sometimes hours) repetitive periods of flashbacks and dissociation which due to thier combat nature could at time be very violent.

He feared he would kill someone if he didn't take himself out first.

As you can imagine I was distraught.

Over the last year he has improved with the help of a very understanding therapist,several inpatient admissions when things got too dangerous at home and just a small number of loyal friends,the kids and myself.


To date it is 2 months since his last admission and whilst he sometimes has a bad day where I need to be super carer and keep a good eye out,he is without doubt 80% better than at this point last year.

No misdirected anger tantrums.

No ambulent flashbacks.

No wanting to leave me as I was the" b888h who's messing with my head".


We do get ...

Smiles and laughter.

Consideration and respect.

A sense of positivity and a striving for better.



Yeah OK we still have a lot to work on and there will be relapses but to anyone having the darkest of days....


Things will improve!

 

[Ladyhope Somerset]

Just loving reading this wife of. Brilliant!! You so deserve this turn around towards better times. :tup: :D

Hugs xx

 

[Nicolette]

You so deserve this turn around towards better times.

This is so true!

What I will say from experience, having a husband who manages his PTSD much better than when I first met him, the shift, of getting used to having 'better' is that after awhile when they stumble, fall over or have a set back, you are used to the 'new improved situation'. As you become used to things getting better - what used to difficult is forgotten as you become comfortable with the progress. Set backs then, if severe, while never as bad as the past, can have the same feelings of despair, frustration, sadness as when dealing with the bad as your new 'benchmark' for this type of situation lessens in decreased expectation of severity.

Hope this makes sense.

 

[Eleanor]

Keep racking up those good days wifeof! So glad to hear you all are doing so much better. (Phew!)

 

[SeekingSerenity]

When I read this, I realise that what I am going through with my sufferer is nothing in comparison.

It makes me feel embarrassed to whinge and bitch and moan and have the self-pity that I have been. It makes me realise just how blessed I actually am.

"I cried because I had no shoes, until I saw someone with no feet."

Thank you, wife of, for helping me to see a little more clearly again :oops:

 

[Tinyflame]

I think ptsd can extract a toll on anyone, it's not whining. Thankfully hopefully things can get better, that's what counts.

More to supporters' or families' credit if they can or are able to forgive or to work through it- for someone with ptsd they can't escape it (the ptsd) but for supporters they don't have to stay.

 

[Srain]

((((((((((((((Wifeof))))))))))))))

I am so glad you posted this, I'm happy to hear that things are getting better, you both have been through it. We have too at our home and sometimes I wonder at the resilience of my Husband but after reading what you wrote I do know, first of all we love each other and as he reminds me when I feel so tired - it's been far worse than it is today.

I wish you many many joyful peaceful days.
Rain

 

[Tinyflame]

..and as he reminds me when I feel so tired - it's been far worse than it is today.

Oh Rain, how true! That can be a powerful reminder.

 

[Nicolette]

I do know, first of all we love each other and as he reminds me when I feel so tired

From a Supporter.... and I know you probably already do.... give that back whenever you have the strength to as sometimes being told you are loved is that bit above knowing it. ;)

 

[Tinyflame]

Yes, perhaps Nicolette we as people with ptsd don't let our guard down enough.

And definitely don't say the things we should, sometimes (or often). :(

 

[myvetswife]

It's sounds great wife of!Thats the time we supporters charge up and thats when we know it was worth getting through the difficult times!

 

[amethist]

It is worth sticking in there if you can.

I go out twice a week now to do a volunteer job, today I came home to a slightly anxious, but smiling husband.

It has taken him 3 weeks to get to this point, knowing I wont be home for at least 4 hours. But he has got there.