Triggered By Things Unrelated

[DontGiveUpOnMe]

I have noticed that my triggers have expanded. I dont know how to explain this very well...so bare with me here.

There are obvious triggers...certain hand motions, movements, smells, etc....

It is hard to try to heal when you live with your trigger and there is no way out. When I was younger, the words "You'll see whats gonna happen once we get home" Always sent me into deep overwhelming anxiety. My mom still says those words to me today and I become enraged and irritated....my body starts aching. I think that since my mother has been triggering me more and more...my triggers are becoming less identifiable. (No I cannot leave my house, and wont be able to for a long time...its complicated)

Now, I am catapulted into feelings of unsafety and body aches by things unrelated. Like a street I have to walk down. If anyone observed me walking in the street, they would find I cross many many streets....because I get horirble feelings when on certain streets..or sometimes I will deem one side safe...and once I arrive there I change my mind and cross the street again.


Now everything....certain times I wake up in the morning...certain trees, seats in buses, the smell of air, the position of the sun, the time of day, how much money I have in my wallet.....just nearly everything will catapult me back somewhere. I cant control it and its not always a flashback...its just feeling like I did. Thing is, most of these triggers are unrelated to my past...For example: there are some streets I have never walked down, yet they are triggers. I do not understand my trigger responses. Its very worrisome and makes me just want to stay home forever and never speak to anyone. I feel like even if something isnt from my past...it can just become a new trigger.

Its like being in 2010...but just feeling like you are in 2003....I cannot ground myself back, I just feel this way until it wears off.
Then again, these triggers sometimes dont always trigger me Like...the sun will trigger me on Teusday, but then the next day its okay. UGH.



I just dont know what to do. I apologize if this post doesnt make much sense...Im very confused at the moment

 

[Jubilation4Me]

Hello DontGiveUpOnMe,

I can't explain how......but, I can really understand some of the things you've mentioned in the above post. I can't find the appropriate words, but I can really, really relate to alot of what you're experiencing. It drives me crazy to the point of being an almost "shut-in" the majority of the time. I can't offer you much help in ways of coping, but I CAN offer you moral support and empathy!

Take care,
J4M

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

Hello,

While I can't say I do all that. I do somethings...

I grit my teeth a lot. Most of the time I don't even realize I am doing it, until my jaw starts aching.

I get that way about streets too. Do you mean like a vibe?

If I don't like the 'feel' of a place, I will leave. Even if I have to argue with people to do it, lose friends. Doesn't matter. If I can't stand the vibe, I will get to much anxiety. Then I have to leave.

There's more, I just can't think of them. They have become to common placed in my life now, I guess...

 

[Jestadud]

Do you think that it might be that now you know about triggers you are looking for them and testing everything to see what does and what doesn't affect you?

 

[Tinyflame]

I think jestadud may be on to something there: perhaps you are becoming more aware of how you feel?

 

[DontGiveUpOnMe]

I see what you mean, and it makes sense. But I try my best not to be aware. Im only aware once terror strikes. Its once I get to that certain side of the street and I feel the horror of being there I realize thats a trigger. But Im not trying to test it, I try to avoid these things as much as possible. Its just getting to the point where now everything is piling up. I think the worst thing is that since I spoke about things in therapy, I am scared of my therapists office. Soon enough I might end up being afraid of her because I keep fearing she will suddenly want to hurt me. Its just getting out of hand, Im not sure what it is anymore.

 

[Manic11]

I can't help but say with excitement that I'm not alone! I always felt this exact same way and haven't been able to find the words to describe it so I have kept it to myself. When I've tried to explain it people look at me like I have 4 heads. I wish I had the answers. I'm in the same boat and I thank you for this thread. It feels like a small weight has been lifted just by knowing I'm not alone anymore.

Manic

 

[DontGiveUpOnMe]

Wow, I am so happy I could help.

It makes me feel so much better knowing that expressing this has helped someone else somewhere.

:)

 

[anni]

Ha! That's amazing! Someone put 'it' into words! I always thought 'it' must be the result of these endless 'tentacles' that are attached to triggers. Like if you're triggered by hospitals, and someone in another hospital is wearing a blue hat- well you don't even know it but the next person wearing a blue HAT subconsciously triggers you- and THEY have a stupid yappy dog, so THEN.... . Anyway, that's the only thing I've been able to figure out why the heck these unrelated things start to freak you out when they seem to have nothing to do with the original trauma. Un-scientific, un-founded, un-everything, but something has to explain this stuff. It makes an awful lot of us crazy, apparently.