Devastated, completely furious. My shoulders and neck are so tight right now, I'm in physical and emotional pain. I feel like I just wasted 4 hours typing a reply to a woman who is clueless. I feel like an idiot for even considering that she might have changed...or be willing to. I didn't really believe she would, but I gave her a chance...and she has chosen to not follow through on her word again.
I'm hurt, confused and so tired.
I don't want to be this warring, angry person anymore. I don't even know why I am like this. I've been combatitive since the first moment she broke the bond of trust with me, years ago. I used to be so peaceful, and now I'm just filled with anger and violence, and she's right...I'm not happy living this way. I'm so miserable it's unbelievable.