What Are You Feeling Today? Not Thinking, Rather Feeling! Can You Identify Yours?

[Philippa]

I'm feeling like I am all bottled up emotionally, and scared to let it all out.

I'm feeling a bit blah today, and want to go back to bed. I feel the need to be creative and write, or paint, but am not motivated to actually do it...which annoys me.

I'm proud of my kitten for handling the bath I gave her earlier. She isn't hating me now at all as I expected, but has been hanging out with me and cleaning herself dry. SO sweet.

I am feeling so unmotivated and lazy to get more cat food for her, and the other things I need to buy before tonight, as there will only be friday to get them, which I can wait for and she has enough food to last til then. Guess I just made up my mind about that one.:D

I felt worthless earlier when I first woke up and attribute that to the guilt I've been feeling for cutting ties with my family. I feel conflicted and anxious and trying not to future think too much.

 

[shoulderblades]

Therapist was good. Very understanding, very validating. Our session went for almost two-and-a-half hours instead of the standard one hour. Everything I was saying sounded to me like I was babbling - literally babbling. My words made no sense to my own ears but apparently I was speaking coherently and with purpose. Amazing what you can do when you're on autopilot and not realising it. :-/

I cried and shook and let it all pour out, and cried a crap tonne more, and now I just want to sleep. Feels like I've been flattened with a steamroller. No energy, feel empty and hollow. Exhausted. *crawls into bed*

 

[Annicus]

I feel anxious today. I called a therapist so I feel a mixture of anxiety and excitement.
I am angry with myself but invested in growing rather than withdrawing.
I feel it is time for action.

 

[Philippa]

I feel angry.

 

[Addy]

Why am I bracing myself for a confrontation, to be told by the therapist that I'm overreacting and overemotional and just looking for attention?

Any therapist that would say that to you is not the right therapist. Perhaps, as you mentioned, this is just the message your abusers would want you to believe. Believe in yourself instead, and as others have stated, take some time out for yourself and slow things down a bit. Gotta take care of yourself shoulderblades! Best of luck.

 

[shoulderblades]

I feel angry

:-( *offers gentle and soothing hugs*

Any therapist that would say that to you is not the right therapist. Perhaps, as you mentioned, this is just the message your abusers would want you to believe

You are right, and actually my therapist today said the same thing: those thoughts are programmed thoughts from years of invalidation, demoralisation and emotional negligence. It was very validating to hear her say that. I still couldn't shake the fear that she didn't believe me or that she was secretly thinking I was making this up, and I confessed that to her, to which she said in a very gentle voice, "How or why would someone make up all of this?" It gave me pause and I realised, yeah, how would someone make up the shit I've gone through? How could someone live a lie like that? What an awful lot of work it would take to make sure that lie was believable and consistent. That realisation in and of itself was also very validating. All I need now is constant reminders and reassurance of this so that the neural pathways will form and function in a much healthier way.

Thanks for the wish of luck. I appreciate it. *offers hugs*

And *hugs* to everyone else who might need one today. I know I do.

 

[ms spock]

I am feeling like the old me and it is a good feeling.

Great news KP!

 

[ms spock]

You are right, and actually my therapist today said the same thing: those thoughts are programmed thoughts from years of invalidation, demoralisation and emotional negligence. It was very validating to hear her say that. All I need now is constant reminders and reassurance of this so that the neural pathways will form and function in a much healthier way.

And *hugs* to everyone else who might need one today. I know I do.

Hugs back shoulderblades!

I am so glad you got a therapist! I am so, so pleased to read this.

 

[Tanishq]

I have headache right now.

 

[ms spock]

I am feeling better about myself and my life. I have a lot to work and I will do it a bit each day.

 

[goingonhope]

At this hour I am feeling insecure, cold, nervous, shaken, concerned, uptight, disappointed, and courageous.

I am needing to be strong!

And, I'm torn between wishful thoughts and understanding my risk and related fears.

 

[ChavaRo]

Exhausted. Also feel comforted by the many people in my life who care about me. Excited about future classes I plan to take and activities I plan to participate it - lots of incentives to get better. Looking forward to starting with an EMDR certified therapist in mid-March.