What Are You Feeling Today? Not Thinking, Rather Feeling! Can You Identify Yours?

[Iam]

I am exhausted, totally wiped out but.....I am less sad than I've been.

I am feeling like I can make the commitment to start doing some of the positive self talk that I know is so helpful in feeling better, lifting my attitude and ultimately my behavior.

Hey, at least you'd be moving Ayesha! Sorry, don't mean to trivialize as I do know what you mean.

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

Hey, at least you'd be moving Ayesha!

I'll probably hit a wall like this---> :wall:

lol, I'll be moving and I will feel something!

That's a good step Iam. I should learn that too... I need to stop ignoring that my childhood happened. It hurts more to talk about my childhood then it does my sexual trauma's, I have no idea why...Maybe because I see it in the eyes of a child??

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

Oh, I am also feeling that my antidepressants aren't working for me. I don't notice a different if I take them or not...It should help with ADHD, I don't feel any more focused.

 

[Iam]

You know it's funny Ayesha, I don't really feel anything about my sexual traumas. It is the childhood abuse from parents that hurts the most. Though I do feel fear and that could also be from the rapes. I guess it really doesn't matter. The main thing is that I need to gain control over my thoughts, instead of letting my feelings control me. That is one of the reasons this thread is so good. We can state exactly what we are feeling, not thinking, feeling. Once we've identified that we can trace it back.

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

That is one of the reasons this thread is so good. We can state exactly what we are feeling, not thinking, feeling. Once we've identified that we can trace it back.

Yes! I agree! I didn't realize until after last session how so very hard it is to talk about my childhood! I never noticed that before. I just couldn't, it was always so painful. My father was abusive. My parents separated, and the long 2 years it took them to finally get divorced. My mother was sick all that time (she has a very bad disease) and I wasn't taken care of, my teacher would make fun of my lack of care ( unwashed clothes,dirty hair etc.) but she never told anyone. I was also on Ritalin all this time, and I also felt zombie like ( which I need to talk about with my psychiatrist tomorrow), my grades were awful because of that. My teachers always treated me like I was stupid, no one questioned the medication or my home life. My best friend died of cancer when I was 12....and so on and so on. I can say all that, I just can't feel it. When I start to, I stop and refuse to talk about it anymore.

My T asks a little more ( or the same things) every session, he's trying to ease into it. It's all so damn painful. What makes it worse is I am still paying for it. <---I can't go near a school without having a panic attack! Actually that felt good...maybe I will post this even though its off topic.

 

[Jawn]

I am feeling hopeful today.

Jawn

 

[cherryblossom]

I'm feeling like I can relax now that the 'business day' is over.
Re-start battles tomorrow.

 

[goingonhope]

:smile: Glad to hear this, Jawn!

Also, me too.

I am feeling both hopeful and very well rested today!

 

[Elizabeth]

My stalker knocked on the door last night. I did not answer. Today I am feeling fear, anger, withdrawn, hopeless and hopefully. The last feelings perplex me.

 

[Deleted member 6617]

Another sleepless night. Exhausted!

 

[Iam]

Better
Stronger
but still
Fragile
Afraid
Sad

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

Better and a little more confident, and a very strong sense of relief!....its nice to know what is wrong. I can deal with things...but they at least have to have a name!