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What's Keeping You Alive?

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1- My children
2- My job which I really love
3- My best friend who is like a sister to me
4- The fact I have survived hell and back, should be greatful for the nice life I have now
5- The little things in life such as a warm bath, a glass of wine/Beer and chocolate
6- My warm duvet and bed which I can sleep in longer on Saturdays
7- My collection of jackets and coats heheh
8- My collection of boots
9- Good sex
10- Cuddles
 
I'm staying alive tonight so I can get up in the morning and go to the store for ice cream. I can't take another day without it! I have nothing left in my fridge or pantry because last time I went to the store the alarm malfunctioned and I had to leave. I couldn't get passed the jolted scare to my nerves -- it was a bad day anyway. I'm determined to go tomorrow. If I get nothing else, I'm at least getting ice cream.
 
My family, I love them so very much, I am blessed.
The realization today that as a child I was basically a good kid that had jerky parents and grandparents.
I'm sober and I quit smoking.
This laptop so I can talk to the good people on this forum.
Very grateful today. I have so much to be thankful for.

That I am doing so much better than I was in 1985. that those dark days are long gone, and I have new days with alot of good times and people in it. Life is so much better.

Even though I have hard days still, I am doing so much better. Really grateful for hat.
 
Mmmm, what flavour?

I didn't make it to the store today :(, but I will try again tomorrow.
I only like 2 kinds: Breyers mint chocolate chip on a cone - or - generic vanilla/chocolate in a bowl with gingerale and a drizzle of coconut oil poured on top. The gingerale fizzes to a creamy froth, and the coconut oil becomes crisp little crunchy granules.

I like it because I don't have to eat a lot to get enough calories when I have ice cream around. It also gives me my dairy. I can eat it everyday if I had it in my freezer. Milk goes bad too fast. I only go grocery shopping every 2 months or so. I get the organic milk because it lasts longer, but not long enough to last 2 months without drinking it up first. I sometimes get yogurt, but I get paranoid about the contents.

Sometimes it doesn't bother me, but at times my paranoia is so high, I'm scared to eat anything that is processed with bacteria. I keep thinking they are genetically modifying the bateria which produce sugars that act like organic nanobots and can control our brain chemistry. :cautious: I rationalize they can't do that with ice cream. The specific sugars that act like nanobots (our brain metabolizes sugar for energy) can only be produced by live cultures. It can't be a sugar additive that sits idle in the food waiting to be consumed. It would be an organic product that must be listed in the ingredients.

:unsure: I wish I didn't have these thoughts.
 
1. My kids because I have hope one day they will be famous and will keep ME up.
2. My pets because if I die they will too because no one else will feed them.
3. My job because I refuse to think I couldn't or might not make a difference in a life one day.
4. My bills because I would hate for someone else to pay them.
5. My belief that my higher power has a purpose for me and all the crap lessons.
6. My friends that have stood by me might really look crazy for standing by me if I off myself.
7. My enemies because that would make them happy and make them winners. F that.
 
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