When Therapists Recommend Staying In Contact With Abusive Parents:

[Philippa]

I just want the night mares to go away, so tired of relieving the past. I want to be back to the strong, unafraid person I used to be.

I hear that. I used to be so fearless when I was in my late teens, early twenties. I want that back.

 

[Wanda]

Me too!

 

[Queen Boudica]

I'm reading a book at the moment; Toxic parents by Susan Forward, just started it but it might help you votedmostcheerful and others who have posted here about their abusive parents. It is about overcoming that legacy and reclaiming your life.

 

[Estacia]

I have been orphaned half my life. My first and main abusers, my parents both died three months apart in 1996.(alochol related deaths)

I feel they died so I can live. Through out the years I have wonder what they or I would be like if they were both here.

My sister who is 29, her childhood friend is still scoring dope for her aging mother. It hit me. We would still be salves to them. You must think about this. Is having your abusive parents in your life going to make your PTSD better?... Most likey not. Or Are they going to make you go off the deep end?

Best wishes to you.

 

[saffy]

I cant quite understand what your therapist wants you to gain if you do have contact, is she/he asking you to face your fears? seems a pretty chancy move to request.

I am now totally estranged from my 'care givers' if you can call them that. it has helped me immensly as even the thought of sitting and being pleasant with them was triggering and I felt totally hypocritical. I tried to talk to them about it years ago and just got laughed at or blamed. I recently wrote a letter trying to move on in a more positive way but they failed to answer. Which made me feel even worse, I wish I hadnt bothered and trusted my beleif that they actually would try.

I would find out the reasoning for her advice to see them and/or find another therapist.

best wishes
Saffy