When You Want To Do Things, But Just Can't ... What Is That?


These older threads often contain incredibly useful things.

I cannot get my washing put away because of avoidance? It makes sense that it’s part of my ptsd but how do the things tally? I am just avoiding all of everyday life ? ( um, yeah.... it’s actually quite hard to even put a wash on let alone put it away).

So does tackling putting the washing away help tackle other stuff too?

Deleted member 8714

Sometimes I can't get stuff done because it requires more energy than I have to expend on that particular chore or routine. I find this is true when there are many stressors affecting me. I've got that situation right now.

Though at the same time, I'm writing a psychological thriller based on my childhood with my psychopathic, serial killer father. My goal is one hour longhand each day. I've been doing this goal now for over a week. Three weeks doing something makes it a habit. I think I missed one day and I'm not beating myself up over it.


I get the intense frozen fear lock down ting but mostly as I'm working on breaking down some longstanding boundaries. This time of year is a particularly difficult transition to lighter clothing swimming etc. I lost my virginity to five men age six in the newest line of summer clothing. AND BREATH. I typed that, I actually did. Yep I just pinched myself and its still there and post..??.… I feel angry and want to scream that I hate photographers but I know it's not anyone's profession that makes them a sicko. But this is now and so what I bailed on swimming yesterday? I am so sick of this vomit. I'm trying again today. At least I broke down and admitted my true major triggers to hubby. He can see I'm trying to break the cycle of ghosting in the summer. I am breaking the cycle.


Sorry for the necro but this is so relatable it's painful to read.

I honestly think it comes from childhood trauma (as my past and this thread seem to indicate), but I unfortunately haven't found how to fix it, I should have hoped all this would happen as some sort of "midlife crisis" as I would have had enough independence then to make significant changes in my life, but I have always been very secluded and spent a lot of time thinking about life, which seems to have brought me no good as from my current situation, as I have to bring some work in and not even started it on the night before said day.

Anyway, as of thinking about it, if I were to be older, the best way of fixing my behaviour would probably be to leave from my mother's house, as she is doing all she can to help but it only seems to be making it worse (due to past trauma I won't be getting into to keep this of readable length).

Best of luck to anyone going through the same drawer as me (so much time on my hands from doing nothing I'm making shit up).

P.S.: I didn't post this for help it's just here so I feel better about how lacking my commitment to my future has been, which in itself is deplorable.


I'm really glad this post has come up.

Can really relate to it & it's good to not feel alone.

This is a real struggle for me & has been for a long, long time. Currently trying to take the pressure off by not using should statements & beating myself up. Really hoping that it'll work & I'll be more functional.

Also downloaded the streaks app to try to build good habits. Hope that'll help as well.

Rani G2

spending 7 years in a boarding school, where the chances of actually getting started on things I wanted to do - was zero.

This resonates with me. Spent 4 years in a catholic nuns boarding school.

Energy/Mental capacity was ( It has lessend now) reduced to Do things which are absolutely necessary. Now, I had a package from Amazon I needed to send back. I couldnt, didnt, just ignored. Cannot tell you why. Irrational actions in Daily life... which then makes me think that I am a weak human who's just stupid.
Only Yoga seems to keep me stable, but that also means persistence. Not always easy...
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Random Person

This is my first post. I have been struggling with non-productivity for years. It's been a nightmare since I lost my job 3 years ago.
For me, I just feel so very, very, very overwhelmed. All I can do is zone out playing computer games and other light and fluffy, can't deal with real life type activity. I feel like I'm in a triggered state.

It also feels like I can't do one more thing that isn't fun or positive because the positive/negative thing hasn't been at all balanced in my life, especially the last 13 years or so. One can only handle so much neutral or negative without some positive to balance it out. If life is all work...

It seems that when I am calmer and feeling more in touch with my inner nurturing adult, I can sometimes talk myself into starting something small, and it progresses from there until I get frustrated or overwhelmed again.

It's kinda the same for me and i really do hate it my dude.

I had a whole closet full of empty boxes, "in case I needed to send something to someone." Like, uh, when do I sned anything in a box to ANYONE! (Never).

I threw them all out on New Years Day this last January.

I started to clean and organize, got as far as organizing and cleaning my closets and lost my "steam" after that. My place is livable, but not very neat. At least it is clean. That is not due to my doing though. Social Services sends a lady once a week for two hours to help me keep my place clean! (Long story how that came about). I'm not complaining though.

FOr me, partially, it is because household chores were used as punishment by my parents. I distain them, as they make me feel like I am being punished, so I don't do them, period. Were it not for my helper, my apartment would be a total disaster!

I feel like that about my housechores as well cus my parents used it as punishment as well and i hate that too.


I have been experiencing this inner state growing over the past 10 years and really come to a serious level now. I've had Crohn's disease for a long time, I know about the nutritional malabsorption and damage to my dopamine and serotonin system concentrated in the gut. It exists though, even when I dabble in substances that provide the elevated levels of them and feel motivation ( which is rare now lol) and I can do things that are like chores and responsibilities I need to do; but ironically, I have the biggest resistance to the nice pleasurable things I want to do in my life. I've been trying to get myself to play the Witcher 3 for months... I really conceptually want to, then as I start to I get the anxiety attack of I should be doing something else, I need to be doing something productive. I would just like to be able to at least do the things I think I'd like to do, then Work on actually enjoying the experience... =/