D
daretodream
I had to read my diagnoses after months of fighting to obtain my mental health records and a fee of $200.00 at 25 cents per page to photocopy. The process to obtain my records was in many ways, traumatic for I was belittled and degraded for asking and forced to keep asking numerous times in hope I would stop. When I read them I was horrified at some things written in them but that is another topic altogether. What I observed is all the therapists I had seen through those years prior had diagnosed me with PTSD but none had told me ever. Why I will never know .
Reading my file helped me to seek help . I began on the internet where I met a wonderous woman whom recommended reading for me and through the book Waking the Tiger by Peter A Levine I learnt i was not losing my mind but actually normal for what I had endured in my life.
I have done a great deal of my healing on my own and I find I have done quit well when all is said and done in the end. I was blessed to met one therapist worthy of staying with from a sexual assault center. The therapists I had prior through government funding here proved to be anxious to heal you in 6 sessions or state you are not working hard enough or trying to heal . Basically suck it up and get over it. Since I never was permitted to address any of my past in any of my sessions this proved hard to suck up and get over it. It was also hard to have male therapist state some woman like being gang raped, another story.
By finally accessing a therapist whom actually had some healthy methods to deal with my sexual past was refreshing and most productive. I was not able to speak in detail or even address much of my abuse even in the 4 yrs I have been in therapy but have found many worthwhile tools and skills that have helped me to work through a lot and to deal and even over come many. When you keep secrets for over 30 yrs they simply do not come easily forth.
In summary having a diagnosis can be helpful for it enables one to address the cause more effectively and efficiantly. I still find few really do know how to treat PTSd with out creating more trauma at least in the system I live within here.
Reading my file helped me to seek help . I began on the internet where I met a wonderous woman whom recommended reading for me and through the book Waking the Tiger by Peter A Levine I learnt i was not losing my mind but actually normal for what I had endured in my life.
I have done a great deal of my healing on my own and I find I have done quit well when all is said and done in the end. I was blessed to met one therapist worthy of staying with from a sexual assault center. The therapists I had prior through government funding here proved to be anxious to heal you in 6 sessions or state you are not working hard enough or trying to heal . Basically suck it up and get over it. Since I never was permitted to address any of my past in any of my sessions this proved hard to suck up and get over it. It was also hard to have male therapist state some woman like being gang raped, another story.
By finally accessing a therapist whom actually had some healthy methods to deal with my sexual past was refreshing and most productive. I was not able to speak in detail or even address much of my abuse even in the 4 yrs I have been in therapy but have found many worthwhile tools and skills that have helped me to work through a lot and to deal and even over come many. When you keep secrets for over 30 yrs they simply do not come easily forth.
In summary having a diagnosis can be helpful for it enables one to address the cause more effectively and efficiantly. I still find few really do know how to treat PTSd with out creating more trauma at least in the system I live within here.
