Writing My College Admissions Essay On My Ptsd, Disassociating Hard Right Now

[racheldiane]

I'm writing this essay about my experience with PTSD, sitting in my college counselor's house right now and I suddenly got triggered (obviously haha) and started having pretty intense physical symptoms. My heart is fluttering (in a bad way) and I feel outside of my body ): I couldn't even remember how to create a new post when I got to this website and I feel totally disconnected. I don't want to waste the time I have here disassociating because my applications are due in 5 days but I feel really weird now. Could someone try and talk me down? I just feel really disconnected and awful.

 

[Deleted member 27340]

Try to count a given number of things in a specific colour. Such as 5 red, then 5 orange, 5 yellow, 5 green, 5 blue and 5 purple. The rainbow, in other words.

It could put you mind on something else and make you grounded because you have to connect to the world around you and the time right now.

 

[JEKBreatheandBelieve]

Remind yourself of today's date and where you are and that whatever trauma you had is not happening now. Say it out loud. It's another way to connect yourself to the present day and time.

 

[racheldiane]

I feel okay just my thoughts are very disorganized. I'm eating some sea salt and vinegar chips and I think that's sort of helping me come back to earth. There are a bunch of kids here and when I felt it coming on I left to another room where it is quieter, and that helped it from turning into a full blown episode, now I'm just kinda feel like I'm on drugs and nothing is real. Which is an awful feeling, but better than things feeling 'too real.' I think if I just sit and eat these chips I should be fine in a while but I feel really weird right now and I need to write my stupid college essay

 

[Seagreen]

Yes take sometime out. If you can be alone for half an hour or so in a quiet room. Wait until you feel ok again before attempting any work as otherwise you might find yourself feeling worse.

 

[afuneralinmybrain]

I feel really dissociated right now as well. So just remember that you're not alone. Do you have any perfume on you? I find strong smelling stuff like that grounds me.
God, but it is just the worst, isn't it? Sometimes I think I just can't handle it. But our problem is common and we can get through it, okay?

 

[racheldiane]

I'm feeling better now and I finished my essay! :)

Thank you guys for the support