Fantasy Relationships

[Pakadlangitok]

You know Fantasy Football? Well, it has dawned on me. I keep having a series of fantasy relationships Does anyone else do this?

It dawned on me after my friend w her "crush" and I was thinking. I have these fantasies with people who I know and they are kindly to me and all.......but nothing romantic. I really look funny and dress weird so no one ever would feel that way toward me.

But I start to feel that way toward them! It's NOT crazy like that movie with the bunny in the pot. It's not like an obsession. It's just like I am watching my alternative life through a window , like ALWAYS seeing, "Oh ,if only I were normal..........someone like that!!"

It is like what I cannot have.

It makes me so sad that I have to get away from that person and go to another store or church or whatever......then it starts again. It is like TV. I do not have a TV. Maybe if I had a TV I could just watch sappy romantic movies and get it that way?

It always makes me sad when it happens.

Anyone else??

 

[BlueOrange]

I've fantasized about relationships with a lot of people. Sometimes, I've acted to try and achieve the relationships I've dreamt about. Sometimes, it has worked out to be really embarassing for me. Sometimes, it wasn't embarassing, but I didn't get what I wanted. And sometimes, I do get a positive experience that is similar to what I was fantasizing about!

Have you got a therapist? Have you talked to them about your fantasies?

 

[NatBird]

I can relate although I don't generally fantasize about people I know.
They are usually quite idealised unrealistic people with issues but issues that I can handle and I have my issues they can handle and its difficult at times but we work through it.

Meanwhile outside of this maladaptive daydreaming, (disovered this on the forum and it's definitely what I've been at) I'm not making the effort to achieve the kind of intimacy I fantasize about, I use to take the edge off the pain in the bind of lonliness and fear of connection, ultimately I use it to avoid.

I do think if someone is into creative visualisation/deliberate creation then this can be a great way to create what you want.