My Oven Is An Issue / Struggling

[J'qel]

Grab a book or a movie. It's much better way to disappear out of life when things get rough than almost any other means. Mind vacations via media can be a god send.

Take care of yourself hon.

 

[ladee]

Give yourself credit for fighting this feeling and the thoughts.
It takes a lot of courage and energy to not surrender to what is pulling us down.

You have taken steps to get the stove fixed. That is an extremely loud proclamation of how hard you are trying.

Another day has passed and that is great news.
Gentle hugs if you accept.

 

[theshadowoftheliving]

Okay, oven is fixed, so it's a little harder for me to gas myself now.

My therapist hasn't responded to my email, though, and I'm really struggling with that as I emailed her yesterday.

I wanted to feel better today but instead I'm just feeling so, so much worse.

 

[cat-lady]

It might be that your therapist doesn't check email that often and will respond faster to a phone call. Also, you are not stuck with one therapist. If you feel you need a second opinion there's nothing wrong with getting one. I'm sorry you're feeling worse today. There will be a better day!

 

[theshadowoftheliving]

I don't want a different therapist, I want my own therapist. I want her to explain how this can be true and not true at the same time and why if it isbt things are such a mess.

I'm just so spacey and dizzy and my head hurts. I can barely stay upright and moving and it's taking too much energy to not just lie motionless on the floor. The insiders aren't happy with me. They keep crying and trying to hurt me.

 

[J'qel]

If you need to take a rest, get some sleep, do it. When we're tired it makes everything so much harder. Stick your mind in something else for a while, movies, books, daydreams, whatever takes you out of your head, and keep it there as long as you need to. You're in a very trying place right now, taking the time to distance yourself from the awful is necessary.

Take care of yourself first, everything else will follow.

Sending you wishes that it gets better soon.

 

[theshadowoftheliving]

I'm just so sad that my therapist never emailed me back. I feel even worse. But maybe also a little better? I had the strong image last night of wrapping my self up in a blanket and hiding myself in a dark, sealed room. Like protection. Today is easier because I'm disconnected. I feel like Shadow isn't here anymore, she's hidden for safe keeping. And, I don't know how much more I can try to do this.

 

[joeylittle]

I'm just so sad that my therapist never emailed me back.

How long has it been since you wrote?

 

[theshadowoftheliving]

@joeylittle I wrote her on Wednesday. Assuming, at this point, more than 48 hours later, that I just won't hear back. Sucks also that it is a long weekend so she won't even check email until Tuesday.

Oh well. Trying to stay far away from the Shadow I wrapped up to protect; I don't want to do anything to make her come back out.

 

[J'qel]

I don't know what her caseload is like, nor how much spam mail she gets or what you wrote in the subject line. There could be a very good reason she hasn't gotten hold of you yet that is completely mundane. Overfull email boxes, confused with spam mail, out of town, etc etc.

Until you get to see her and ask her, there's really no way to tell, and if you do talk to her and she gives you a reason that you don't think is appropriate, there are other very good very supportive therapists out there. You're not lost, just delayed.

It's okay hon. Wrap up in your blanket if you need to, do whatever self care you think necessary until this can get cleared up. Worrying about something you can't change or predict right now will only make you feel bad. Put it out of your mind and take it one day at a time.

**sending internet support**