Tonight would be one of the most frightening moments I've had since my child abuse.
I don't like self-diagnosing, as I find it unhealthy, but I simply did a Google search on the symptoms and Sleep Paralysis is what came up.
There are several things that I feel conflicted about, here: my hygiene is quite good. I go to sleep on time, I avoid sugar before bed, etc. All of the basic things that involve taking care of yourself and your health prior to going to sleep are things that I do.
Here's what happened: I've been stressing out a lot today for several reasons that I'm not going to get into, right now. I de-stressed by journaling, meditation and by taking a warm bath. I woke up at midnight and for some reason, and I don't understand this, started having flashbacks of my trauma, but no one had their faces on them. They had their skin on their face, but no eyes, nose, mouth, ears -- nothing. It didn't seem like a big deal, other than the fact that it was just creepy.
I got up, got some water and laid back to sleep. Five minutes later, it felt as though I was dying. I wanted to speak, and I couldn't. I just heard the "spoken" words in my head. I couldn't move my body and I could barely move my eyes. This lasted for several minutes and it was probably one of the most terrifying things outside of my abuse that I have ever experienced. I thought it was going to be my last day alive and now, I'm quite nervous to give sleep another shot. My time is now 5:05 AM, so I think that ship has sailed for tonight.
If anyone can relate to this, give me their opinion on what this could be and how I should go about treating it, I'd appreciate it. I looked up the treatment and it all seems pretty stupid to me, honestly. Most people I've read about who have SP are pretty great when it comes to sleep hygiene. If it is SP (Sleep Paralysis), then, I assume it's due to stress and PTSD? If it isn't SP, though, what could it be? I'll definitely speaking about this in therapy, but just wanted to hear other thoughts before I do.
I don't like self-diagnosing, as I find it unhealthy, but I simply did a Google search on the symptoms and Sleep Paralysis is what came up.
There are several things that I feel conflicted about, here: my hygiene is quite good. I go to sleep on time, I avoid sugar before bed, etc. All of the basic things that involve taking care of yourself and your health prior to going to sleep are things that I do.
Here's what happened: I've been stressing out a lot today for several reasons that I'm not going to get into, right now. I de-stressed by journaling, meditation and by taking a warm bath. I woke up at midnight and for some reason, and I don't understand this, started having flashbacks of my trauma, but no one had their faces on them. They had their skin on their face, but no eyes, nose, mouth, ears -- nothing. It didn't seem like a big deal, other than the fact that it was just creepy.
I got up, got some water and laid back to sleep. Five minutes later, it felt as though I was dying. I wanted to speak, and I couldn't. I just heard the "spoken" words in my head. I couldn't move my body and I could barely move my eyes. This lasted for several minutes and it was probably one of the most terrifying things outside of my abuse that I have ever experienced. I thought it was going to be my last day alive and now, I'm quite nervous to give sleep another shot. My time is now 5:05 AM, so I think that ship has sailed for tonight.
If anyone can relate to this, give me their opinion on what this could be and how I should go about treating it, I'd appreciate it. I looked up the treatment and it all seems pretty stupid to me, honestly. Most people I've read about who have SP are pretty great when it comes to sleep hygiene. If it is SP (Sleep Paralysis), then, I assume it's due to stress and PTSD? If it isn't SP, though, what could it be? I'll definitely speaking about this in therapy, but just wanted to hear other thoughts before I do.