What is therapy supposed to do?

[Deleted member 42783]

My T asked me to come up with a list of things that I want to get out of therapy for next week. I'm a little confused by this because we have gone over treatment plans before and I though we were on the same page.

The thing is, I came into therapy very naïve and I didn't get a PTSD diagnosis until after I started. Now, my original goals seem inconsequential and I don't know that exactly we are doing. processing trauma? Trying to stabilize the depression and SI? (Incidently that was just worsened through talking about the traumas) Am I just there to unload about my week? I'm a bit lost.
So my question is, why are you guys in therapy? What kinds of goals do you have?

 

[screen-name]

I started with the thing that brought me to therapy. Why did you go in the first place? Has that been helped fully or is there more you need there?

 

[Deleted member 42783]

@screen-name. I started therapy to uncover why I was hyper-sexual at times and to be tested for bipolar. That stuff kind of fell by the wayside when I got the PTSD diagnosis and going over traumas kind of caused a resurgence in symptoms and made my ability to concentrate worse. I'm in school and it is getting impossible.
Thanks for the question though. I couldn't even remember why I started when the t asked me these questions yesterday.

 

[WishfulThinking123]

Well I have been with the same T for about 4 years...originally went to T after leaving abusive X husband however, never actually talked too much about it and mostly dealt with current issues that would come up. However, I did eventually develop PTSD and was also dealing with the hypersexuality issue. My PTSD is due to multiple sexual traumas/violations that I have experienced and these things have never been processed before...I never dealt with it, never took them for what they are. In T it is a lot of processing trauma yes but, also more recently the focus has been on reframing the negative distortion I have that all I am good for is sex...However, I would say one of the most important things to focus on is stabilization for sure, try to come up with a plan/coping skills for when you come upon those times of SI. (I understand...I was definitely there yesterday). My T usually wraps up each session reminding me to come up with coping skills, being understanding towards the way I feel.

I used to approach T without a plan and we covered very surface/superficial issues. However, since starting trauma processing I usually show her a couple of recent journal entries and that really helps to guide my session. I usually think of the things I want to cover before getting there so, I can have a plan and real work can be done. There's a lot I would like to talk about during sessions but, I really have to throw out a lot like useless drama in regards to X or little petty family drama and just focus on the big things (mainly past trauma) so, I do a lot of thinking prior to session about whats really important and what isn't. I hope I helped?

Also, yes when trauma processing symptoms such as SI often gets worse. My T told me today that when she goes away for 2 weeks here soon she doesn't want me to journal because she's going to have limited access to her phone and she's worried about me. Processing does make it worse but, prior to processing I was already a mess so...without processing don't think I can move on and finally leave it behind me if that makes sense?

 

[Deleted member 42783]

I think that for me, I've been thrown off and a bit lost in therapy since this trauma stuff surfaced. I've felt like I really needed the T to lead but he hasn't been and that has left me more confused. He hasn't given me a lot of coping mechanisms which hasn't been that helpful and I just want guidance while I figure things out. I tell him that I'm willing to work. I just don't know what I'm doing. Concentrating and thinking clearly in session are impossible right now. I think he is also afraid to give me suggestions sometimes due to our age difference. Like, if I jokingly say "I don't want to do that assignment" he will take it off the table and NEVER give me another assignment.

 

[joeylittle]

Can you make a list if the symptoms (problems) that interfere with your daily life, and/or make it harder to get through the day?

That list can be the list of things you need coping skills for, and that will probably help define goal #1 - stabilization.

 

[Gadgie]

I often used to wonder what therapy was all about as well, as I never felt any difference after a session? It was good to be able to tell someone what's troubling you, but apart from that I never felt any difference really?

Maybe that's why they stopped my therapy, as the only reason they gave me was,......."I had too many issues going back over too long a time"
Ah! well, I seem to be coping not too bad, I still get the night mares and mood swings though.

 

[EveHarrington]

Your therapist should be guiding you through this process. I mean I'm in the process of creating a recovery plan and if I was forced to do it with no help, I'd literally be like f*ck this shit....and move on.

 

[Nessa7]

My first t really overwhelmed me the first time she asked that question. I was thinking that I had to think of goals for the entire time I saw her or long term ones, but she actually meant that those goals were for the next four weeks and that we would come up with new goals after that.

 

[UnicornSightings]

I think that for me, I've been thrown off and a bit lost in therapy since this trauma stuff surfaced...

Mine's like that, too!!! If I say I don't want to do something ONE time it doesn't mean I don't want you to offer it again! But I will likely say no again lol!!

 

[Deleted member 42783]

@UnicornSightings
My husband is the same way lol.
Maybe it's a man thing.

 

[UnicornSightings]

Honestly 2+ years in I still have no idea lol. I did write out a list of goals a couple times and we are addressing those things. I feel like though that what I want to varies so much each week. And sometimes I don't want to work on anything. Just be there and have her do all the work lol. But lately we've been doing free writings that I bring in and read and those are nice for giving the sessions a purpose. Not sure what we will talk about next week although before I randomly quit a couple weeks ago and rescinded we were talking about my feelings when I was around 10 years old and she had planned to address that more. Not really looking forward to that but I think it's a good idea. I like the idea of bringing journal entries in, especially now that I've started to journal again.

Try to think of what's going on with you. Write it out for YOU. What do you want? What's going wrong in your life? What's going right? Which areas do you think you could work at improving with the least/most stress/resistance? Which areas would you like to tackle first? Which areas do you think need a lot of extra support? And don't be afraid to not have any ideas, either. I don't a lot of the time but I still get something out of it. Like a place to sit for 50 minutes with someone staring at me lol.