Hello

[PKTrusty]

Hello,

I figured I would introduce myself. I only did one tour to Iraq but a lot of events happened. I found out the day that I got in Iraq that my wife was leaving me. She had gotten pregnant by another guy. I had to take my R&R to finalize the divorce and move what I had into a storage unit.

I was a officer in charge of a distribution platoon and ran quite a bit of miles including EOD escort and some QRF. I dont claim to have experienced the same level as many on this board but I struggle daily. I was diagnosed with PSTD in a Social dysfunctional form.

I saw a councilor when I got back but it was not much help. I have buried myself in school and work and it has gotten me by till now. I graduate this next semester and the dilemma presents itself. I got out of the Army and I have been in my current location for two years. I have maybe one or two friends 80 miles away that I occasionally do things with. My apartment feels like my CHU and often when I am out I am thinking about getting home.

 

[GunnerZulu]

Brother, as much as you don't think therapy is not much help, your wrong.

Ptsd needs therapy, your story sounds so much like mine, had a fiancé and when I got home it wasn't three weeks until we split up and she sought revenge by moving in with another soldier on base and then she started sleeping with all my co workers. I used to have people come up to me At work asking me how they could better their chances with her. Disgusting. But here's the thing mate I met my wife because of all that shit. If I never went overseas I would still be with that devil woman.. Go to your therapy. You will not defeat this thing with sheer force of will or a magic pill.

 

[Sarg]

Yeah, that's pretty heavy duty wear and tear there. Had it happen to a buddy that I served with. Just wrote him a Dear John while we were in the thick of it. Best advice I can give is concentrate on you. Gunner's right, therapy works. The secret is to find the right therapist that hits all the buttons.

Pull up a chair and join in.

Sarg

 

[Jimmy1]

Welcome PK,

Do me a favor, don't ever talk yourself down by saying that you did not experience what others have. PTSD does not discriminate, and it does not matter if you were fighting hand to hand in the jungle, or a cook in the rear echelon, if you experience any type of life threatening trauma which in turn ends up with you having PTSD, then the symptoms are the same. The only difference is the severity of the symptoms.

Some veterans though might have a shit load more traumas to work through than you, but we all feel the same pain and emptiness in life.

Thats just my two bobs worth.

 

[PKTrusty]

I appreciate the support. We got rocketed quite a bit and my convoy got hit with IED's but no real ambush. The tough part is I didnt have time to deal with the divorce because I had 30 Soldiers who deserved more from me. Additionally, I had decided early that I was going to do everything I could to bring all my Soldiers home. Accepting that and it potential consequences is a pretty tough ledge to step back from.

The tough part is I feel like I know how I should be feeling/acting but the starter for my emotion generator is broke haha. I live in a really small community. (About 6k in a 70 mile radius) and there isnt any real resources around here. I will be moving in August and maybe I will start counseling back up. I "dated" a woman about 2 1/2 years ago and she thought I was abusing depression medication just because I was so emotionless. As I finish school, I would like to try and start dating again.

 

[BaMuoiBa]

Welcome PK, You're in good company take a knee...

Ba

 

[Spock]

...Do me a favor, don't ever talk yourself down by saying that you did not experience what others have. PTSD does not discriminate, and it does not matter if you were fighting hand to hand in the jungle, or a cook in the rear echelon, if you experience any type of life threatening trauma which in turn ends up with you having PTSD, then the symptoms are the same. The only difference is the severity of the symptoms...

Good words Jimmy & very true!

Welcome home PK. You earned your spot here as much as anyone. Stay safe, Stay strong.

 

[Sapper1]

Welcome PK! Listen to what these guys are saying. Each one of them has given excellent advise to go by. I went through something similar. Dating will come, but first definitely get some type of counseling. And don't just go but try hard every single day. It's a mind game. You can't physically beat the "beasts'" ass, but it can't be beat down mentally. Just takes some work and time. You will live a fuller life my friend. Every time you think of something negative about something or someone try to find a positive. Just my two cents bro.

 

[SteveMD]

PKT:

So glad you only have a little PTSD. Is that like a little suicide,or a little fatal car crash?

At least I had a dedicated wife/partner.I can't imagine surviving otherwise.Must be rough.

Welcome.

 

[atilla]

Welcome PK. Fight is right. Doesn't matter that you did 1 tour in Iraq, Brother. There is no such thing really as a little ptsd. All of it is 100% Beast, and it eats only 1 thing, veterans. Counseling will help you, this site will help you. Welcome home brother

 

[reddevil1111]

We are all lonely. And all of us push back on our loved ones at the same time. All I crave is time alone. But when I have it I miss my loved ones and friends.

Therapy helps you flush the trash out. It also helps you figure out what triggers you and how to avoid or cope with those triggers. you learn skills to deal with stress. Its not easy. In fact its more work than anything I ever did before.

The hardest part is being honest with yourself. Figuring out shortcomings and having a willingness to repair and change.

Its a fight for the rest of your life. But if you work hard you can improve your life a LOT. I wont use the word normal. That's impossible. But you sure can regain a lot of your old self. It just takes work and time.

Your doing the first steps, this site, talking about even having PTSD is something a lot of folks cant do. Take a few more steps when you think you can. Challenge yourself to make something better everyday. Maybe its establishing a routine. Or going for a walk. Maybe finding a therapist. Or just write down your feelings and thoughts. Then when you feel strong enough to go talk to someone they can see what your dealing with a lot easier.

Good luck brother. Its not easy but nothing worth doing ever is. Welcome to the site :)

 

[combatgoldfish]

Hello,

I figured I would introduce myself. I only did one tour to Iraq but a lot of events happened. I found out the day that I got in Iraq that my wife was leaving me. She had gotten pregnant by another guy. I had to take my R&R to finalize the divorce and move what I had into a storage unit.

I was a officer in charge of a distribution platoon and ran quite a bit of miles including EOD escort and some QRF. I dont claim to have experienced the same level as many on this board but I struggle daily. I was diagnosed with PSTD in a Social dysfunctional form.

I saw a councilor when I got back but it was not much help. I have buried myself in school and work and it has gotten me by till now. I graduate this next semester and the dilemma presents itself. I got out of the Army and I have been in my current location for two years. I have maybe one or two friends 80 miles away that I occasionally do things with. My apartment feels like my CHU and often when I am out I am thinking about getting home.

Fellow OIF'er here, welcome home.

From my own experience and from others, it takes the right therapist to help and it takes time/trust to allow them to. I've been threw a few myself and I've found the best therapist for me is a combination of a general type of therapist from the VA and the other is myself. Now, when I saw that I, I don't mean I'm a certified therapist or anything. Even though I do talk to myself but I made it a mission to learn as much as possible about PTSD as I can. Nothing more scary than a soldier who knows a bit about how the beast works. I can't stress enough that every combat veteran must educate him/herself about PTSD and never stop trying things to avoid and or handle the triggers, depression, anger, and anxiety

Keeping busy is a way to keep the beast at bay. School and work are two great ways to do it and better yourself and gives you the schedule you need.

I literally locked myself inside my house when I got back. I made it like a CHU as well. I didn't start coming out until I got a dog and that forced me to go out. I've been out for three years, I still isolate a bit too much. I rather be home than out as well.

If you ever need to talk we're all here to listen and or help. If you need to feel free to PM.