Finding it hard to regulate strong emotions

[Deleted member 12723]

I need tips and tricks to help me to learn how to regulate my out of balance emotions in a very extreme crises situation.

I have gone from a self confident person with a much higher self worth and self esteem to all of my symptoms returning back. I know that I have not gone back to square one.

However I am finding that the out of balance overreactions with safe others, has really shot up and I feel horrible about this because I was able to take more things in stride.

I am not able to find balance yet. I am ultra sensitive to things said and have to really just walk away, if I can remember to. I am very embarrassed to admit my struggles in this area because I am finding that I am the one lashing out at times. I hate doing this. I am aware that I need to be coping and managing my emotions in a much healthier way and am needing to know what helps people to be able to do this?

Right now it is not happening a lot of the time but it is uncomfortable to be hurting someones feelings that I truly care about.

I also have found my voice and it is speaking up and I do not yet have the grace to be able to simply not take some things personal. Things I would have sloughed off before the crises.

Thank you.

 

[Anrish]

I can relate to your problem - and I also struggle with strong emotions because they overwhelm me.

If you have the time to analyze them and just feel and accepet them, I can recommend that. And maybe your shock at first is in reality anger or something else.

I think one of the most important things is to accept the feelings, to feel them and then to regulate. Do not fear your own emotions - they're part of you and you're a wonderful person one shouldn't be afraid of.

Another way to deal with strong emotions is writing down what you think and feel. It can be random words, poems...whatever. Just get the emotions out on the paper or draw them (I'm rather the writer type).

*sending supporting hugs*

 

[Deleted member 12723]

I think one of the most important things is to accept the feelings, to feel them and then to regulate. Do not fear your own emotions - they're part of you and you're a wonderful person one shouldn't be afraid of.

Thank you so much for this. You gave me a order of progression. I think I will put this on a post it and put it on my forehead:facepalm::facepalm::) If I can practice these three things in the proper order I am pretty sure it will become a good habit. Accept, regulate and do not fear them. Write the thoughts down on paper where I can see them. I really appreciate this so much. This could really turn into something very useful for me that I can actually do each day in practice until I get better at coping and managing the emotions.

 

[Crow]

When I'm spiraling down in a crisis - like taking my pets to the ER or thinking about losing my home - I write out my fears with my non-dominant hand. Sometimes I'll write questions with my dominate hand and answer with my non dominate hand. When in a situation with people, I'll feel my feet, square breath, naming stuff around me. The thing that has helped the most with people? Saying aloud something like, I'm not feeling my best or I need to leave or I need to change the subject, can we come back to this later. Having the visibility with someone who's safe has helped me more than anything.

 

[Deleted member 12723]

The thing that has helped the most with people? Saying aloud something like, I'm not feeling my best or I need to leave or I need to change the subject, can we come back to this later. Having the visibility with someone who's safe has helped me more than anything.

Thank you so much this builds on the other three for me so well. I could do that now that I know a better way to remove myself first. This is applying to do no harm rule so much. I will be practicing this as well. Writing down what is going on after that is a way to ground myself in reality so you actually gave me things that I can see will work in this area where I need a lot of help also.

 

[Heather]

@Rain I'm sorry you're having such a rough time.

I totally understand where you're coming from.....I was like a maniac for awhile (which you know all about).

For me it took time, lots of time and now my cooler head prevails.

Love you. Hang in there. :hug::hug::hug:

 

[Vidistus]

I'm afraid that if I let myself feel them... I don't know. I get so angry. How do I feel them without them running away with me and making me more angry?

 

[Deleted member 12723]

Feeling our feelings is intensely painful because we are not in the habit of allowing them to exist as they are but I have found that as I continue to feel them and sit with them as much as it hurts, it is a release to express them and get the poison out of me. It is a process and I have had to go slow and even slower now I am in touch with my own angry feelings. It does feel like way too much, so I would guess that you are normal for being afraid to feel them as they are.