DID Parts with t

[Punky143]

I have many different parts and a few aren't so nice either. They write things in the journal saying they don't like my T, call her names and write how much they dislike her. They have spoken with her briefly and thankfully they weren't cruel. Yesterday however, the parts not only wrote the check but also came in and out without being "invited." The parts are in their teens and immature so like in the past, they enjoy playing games or tricking her. Does anyone else have this happen?
Today, I feel ashamed and embarrassed despite my T telling me not to worry but worrying is what I'm best at...

 

[Deleted member 12723]

I hope that someone with the same issues comes along soon to assist you. I would be curious if I was in your position to find out what they do not like about your therapist or do you already have this knowledge? I mean what is the reason they do not like her? I wish you success.

 

[UnicornSightings]

I don't do parts therapy as I think I'm one person with just many layers but sometimes I really don't like my therapist either and act quite rude at times. But we're human beings and we're not gonna be awesome every second. And we're there because we have our issues. So we can apologize and then work on letting it go. I hope you can find some peace!

 

[One step at a time]

Sounds like these parts are playing defense. They're not here to hurt her, they're here to protect you. She probably knows that.

I figure a good T is here for all of us, whether or not we trust her, and doesn't take stuff personally. It isn't about her. She's here to help us figure out the stuff that hurts, so that we can heal.

 

[Punky143]

Well said, thank you. She and I know their role and because of that, she doesn't take it personally. Thing is, these parts really haven't formally met her as I'm working on skills to be able to be present when I need to but it's taking a long time and its frustrating.

 

[Sideways]

Parts that don't particularly like T, or flat out try and sabotage therapy? Totally. You may even find them becoming a bit of a bully, particularly of your littles.

This is the resistance! It's great that you let them journal, because as much as you might not really want them to have a voice? These parts often have a lot they need to get off their chest. They also often have some of the biggest trust issues, and the least inclination to integrate or work as a team.

Like any teen that's been through hell and learned how to keep themselves safe without anyone's help, they're probably going to take the longest to trust you or your T. So, if they've decided they want to talk to your T, you may want to consider ways to help them achieve this as a trust-building exercise (maybe invite them to write down what they want to say so that they don't need to take over during your session?).

But mostly, just hang in there with them. They're angry and betrayed teens, so they need a lot of time, consistency and to be heard. It can get pretty disruptive at times, but if your T is familiar with DID? She'll have experienced parts like this before and she will understand:)

 

[Punky143]

It's10+ years and the angry ones still don't like her, argue, etc and although the parts get angry, they also are manipulating and enjoy the game. The parts journal their annoyance and can obsess over hatred. After they go away, the rest are left embarrassed and ashamed and hopeless.

 

[whiteraven]

I have many different parts and a few aren't so nice either. They write things in the journal saying t...

Oh yes. We have this. And mostly everybody comes and goes without being invited, although there's not too much of that here, 'cause they really don't want to talk to him. They are getting quite adept on the computer, though, which is a problem. They have sent some seriously angry and vicious emails to him and that has led to a lot of embarrassment for me.

He is so very kind, though. He says it is an honor to hear from them, anytime, whatever they have to say. Because even just showing themselves for brief moments and in anger demonstrates small amounts of trust which we can build on. But he is grateful, always, for whatever they have to share.

 

[Keen]

the parts not only wrote the check but also came in and out without being "invited." The parts are in their teens and immature so like in the past, they enjoy playing games or tricking her.

Yes, I had something similar happen. I switched while in the waiting room, without realizing it. The part tried to trick the T and pretend to be me. Thankfully the T noticed the part, who doesn't know how to drive, was there at the end as well, pretending to be me again, and insisted that I don't leave the office till someone who could drive was out front again. Parts can be tricky! But they're supposed to get more cooperative as you go through therapy.

 

[theshadowoftheliving]

This has happened to me. So much worry afterwards about how mean the other was. My therapist assured me it was okay and it was, as I saw over time, but it was so hard to sit with.