Eye contact with t

[hymnless]

This is also a huge issue for me. I started seeing a new T about 2 months ago and realized yesterday that I don’t totally remember what she looks like. I’ve met her 7 or 8 times now and I’m fairly certain that I wouldn’t recognize her if I ran into her at the grocery. I talked to my previous T about this and I think that I use eye contact as a way to control conversations. I wonder if maybe you’re experiencing the same thing? Since you are starting to trust him, maybe it feels slightly less vulnerable to not allow him to see you?

 

[Emotional girl]

I most certainly identify with Nightsky's comments. The focusing on eye contact with the T to...

Thank you for your reply,I know what you mean ,I do have times where I feel like I am not completely there in my sessions.
There are times when my T will ask me a question and he will have to say it a couple of times not because I don't understand him but because I have gone off to a different space in my head.

This is also a huge issue for me. I started seeing a new T about 2 months ago and realized yesterday...

Thank you for your reply,it is strange that something that is meant to be so simple can be so difficult for a lot of us.I think you could be right about the trust issue,it is very rare for me to to trust anyone as I suppose I am scared to let him in fully just incase I get hurt.

 

[whiteraven]

I used to be able to make pretty regular eye contact with my therapist (maybe at least half the time, which for me is pretty good) but since I started to lose trust in every living soul, I can almost never look at him anymore. I still go to therapy and I'd say he is probably the only person I trust enough to sit in a room and be silent with (if that makes sense), but I mostly don't look at him anymore. Mine is mostly due, I think, to anger and disappointment, which we're working on. I guess.

 

[Emotional girl]

Thank you for your reply,It is good that you can just sit in a room quietly with your therapist,I think this shows that you have got some trust.
I hope that you sort out your other problems that are concerning you at the moment with your T.

I had my therapy session today and I made a conscious decision to try and look at my therapist more and I think I looked at him about 15 % instead of my usual 10 %.I actually know the colour of his eyes now and what his hair actually looks like rather than what I imagined what it looked like.
We talked about all the reasons why I find it hard to have eye contact with everyone and the negative thoughts that I get in my head whilst I am doing this very awkward thing for me and that helped.
I guess it is just something I will have to keep practicing at and maybe one day the percentage will go up even further .Thank you very much everyone for your replies,I found them really helpful.