Scanning and fragments

[Teamwork]

today at my appointment with the psychologist he noted how I scan the environment. He said it was not slow or smooth and causes fragments. Asked me what would it be like if I got the whole environment all at once and said would that be better than only remembering pieces of things because I don’t take it all in at once. When he talks like this I feel confused. He tried to show me on the wall. He ran his finger across the wall stopped at a painting crossed it and the whole time he is doing it he commenting on where he is on the wall and where my eyes actually are. Then he requests I try to trace a path on the wall and I do so but he comments your finger is tracking but your eyes are down somewhere else. When I try to coordinate and do both it is exactly that, and weird sense of how to join the two together happens and I feel anxious that I do not know what he wants. It mostly does not make sense and when we stop because he notes that I’ve become upset by something he asks what I’m upset about. When I try to organize it and start talking he mentions that speech is fragmented. This all comes at me like, what is he trying to say and what exactly are we doing and in the end I’ve come home wondering how exactly do people scan, what does he mean and how to start doing something that makes no sense.

 

[NoWhereKnowWhere]

I’m very confused so I can’t even imagine what it’s like for you in the moment.

Have you spoken to him about how confusing this is. And also maybe why is it important. Like maybe ask him to show his thought process on it is.

I’d he trying to have you look at your self awareness? Does he think it’s a symptom of so what? If your struggling in the moment maybe try email or write it all out before hand.

 

[Teamwork]

I’m very confused so I can’t even imagine what it’s like for you in the moment.

Have y...

Yes thank you for understanding the confusion. What I know about him is he’s very much into body observing. What the body is doing tells him things I don’t understand. It’s his go to as much as what your saying is but more so I guess.

 

[MyWillow]

I'm not sure it has to make sense right now? Maybe it's just about creating an awareness.

Like I start to feel panic-y if I have to coordinate breath and a small movement in yoga. Sometimes just focussing on the breath freaks me out. I am learning to notice and accept. Sometimes I can do it and sometimes it makes me want to throw up or run or dissociate. Just having that awareness without judgement is huge for me.