The body keeps the score

[VioletButterfly]

When I first watched the videos included in this thread from the doctor, I had a major Roberta Flack flashback!!!!! How did I miss all of this aspect of what I had going on?!? Well, bad therapy I won't own that. She had me twisted up. Bad!!!!

Void - thank you for bumping this up or I'd have never seen this post. I've been given and directed in a lot of unsafe and inappropriate directions in the past 10 years. I watched the videos and they actually made sense to me (tks to others who added on). I realize that I've been testing my new T based upon what the other T's did that hurt me for a reason - intuition and fear. Now, upon her return, I am anxious to have an honest conversation based upon these fears to see if she has what I need to help me in my healing. I want to heal and feel that I know that I have the capacity to heal. I just need honest and educated direction, and a lot of hard work on my part. I can do my part.

I think there is, truly, a reason why God directed me toward Psych/Bio-psych when I entered university. lol Seriously, though. I think I missed a beat. Better late than never, I hope. I have put the book mentioned in the title on hold at my local library and will do some more research before my next appt. I know that it takes as long as it takes, but I'm running out of time - I know that I have much to do in this life and want to get started on my purpose. Tks! VB

 

[VioletButterfly]

Also, due to my needing to be a gently approached individual, I also put a book on yoga for folks who have experienced trauma. I know there a are a lot of physicality issues that I still need to approach cautiously. TY, TY, TY. :) I've been feeling rather adrift and lost, and hopeless in all of this miasma of therapy, life, drama, healing ...... All my best. VB P.S. The somatic healing is really ringing bells!

 

[oasis2003]

thanks @Anarchy I have just watched the talk from Van de Kolk that you posted. I have read the book already but think I will read it again! I will watch the second one another time. It all makes more sense. I especially found the footage at the end where the mother had a frozen face and the way the little boy reacted so quickly quite touching and revealing to me.:happy:

 

[Angelwings]

Has anyone read, "The Body Keeps the Score"? It's a little out of date but still very interesting. Just curious if anyone has any opinions.

 

[Cactus Bloom]

Hi! I’m not sure if I have read that specific book but I have books like “The Body Remembers” and Peter A. Levine’s books “In An Unspoken Voice: How the Body Releases Trauma and Restores Goodness” and “Waking The Tiger: Healing Trauma” which I believe are on the same kind of thoughts on “The Body Keeps The Score.”

When I came upon these books I found a sense of relief because they explained so much as to how trauma is stored in the body. I’ve had so many odd bodily symptoms and pain that would come and go throughout my life and doctors could never find anything “wrong” which was very upsetting because I have been in so much pain and nobody would help me. I finally discovered the whole mind/body connection and everything started to make sense.

What are your thoughts? Also, if you’re interested, Gabor Mate is someone that really gets into this and you can watch him on YouTube. He really is amazing.

 

[Angelwings]

@Fionas74 May I ask what kind of pain you had in your body? I have intense flashbacks and body memories, but I believe there's more to it than that, right?

 

[Cactus Bloom]

@Fionas74 May I ask what kind of pain you had in your body? I have intense flash...

I’m so sorry you are going through this! I have DID so one thing that I haven’t experienced is flashbacks like reliving any of the trauma I have experienced because each “part” holds different emotions and experiences and I have many of them. What I have found out is that I do have emotional flashbacks which is when all of a sudden my body will start shaking uncontrollably or experience a physical feeling of fear when nothing is going on around me to invoke the reaction. There are others but those are what I consider emotional flashbacks. What I have loved about these books is the understanding of what happens to our nervous system when we have endured chronic trauma and how it just does what it wants unconsciously without me having any control over these reactions.

The pain that I have experienced is really bad digestive issues that have caused me so much pain and I’ve had two colonoscopies (when I was in my early 20’s and another in my early 30’s) but doctors couldn’t find anything wrong. I would be passing out because of the severe pain. I would also have severe shoulder pain that would come and go that couldn’t be explained. Also severe back pain that would come and go out of the blue. I broke out with a horrible mysterious rash that hurt so bad that couldn’t be explained. There was a whole year that I could barely eat because as soon as I put any kind of food in my mouth, I instantly felt like I had been drugged and couldn’t function. All of this stuff was happening because my emotions was being suppressed and they will show up physically.

I would like to answer more questions you have about this. I’m not sure if I’ve touched the surface of what you would like to know.

 

[Teasel]

Has anyone read, "The Body Keeps the Score"?.

Yes, I thought it exceptionally good. You've read it too?

 

[Angelwings]

Yes, I thought it exceptionally good. You've read it too?

@Bearlinda I'm currently reading it. Trying to understand more about my PTSD.

I’m so sorry you are going through this! I have DID so one thing that I haven’t experienced is fla...

I'm trying to sort out what is caused by PTSD and what is caused by other things. I haven't had unexplained pain like you have, just body memory things. If I read this book, maybe I'll realize that something I've experienced is caused by the body "keeping score."

 

[Cactus Bloom]

I'm trying to sort out what is caused by PTSD and what is caused by other things. I haven't had une...

I would encourage you to read the book and maybe it’ll help sort out what’s going on with your body. I hope you find the answers you need. Are you currently in therapy?

 

[Angelwings]

I would encourage you to read the book and maybe it’ll help sort out what’s going on with your bod...

I am currently in therapy. My problem is that anytime I talk about the abuse with my therapist I have a flashback, well not ANYtime, but a lot of the time. I feel like this is holding me back from making any real progress. All I do is try to make it day to day. I'm trying to do some self help stuff without telling my therapist.

 

[Cactus Bloom]

I am currently in therapy. My problem is that anytime I talk about the abuse with my therapist I ha...

I’ve had to do a lot of research on my own about what is happening to me because unfortunately I haven’t had good luck with therapists that know how to treat me or understand me. A trauma therapist is pretty much the way to go and hopefully trained in how to treat the problems with dissociation and flashbacks like you experience. It’s extremely complex to treat PTSD and many times you may have to change therapists to find one that you find safe and has the skills and training to not push you too fast where you are re-experiencing your trauma constantly.