What do you notice about yourself when you lapse following a self care routine?

[Hopeforlife]

When my toe nails need cut and painted!
Waxing needs are over due.
When I give in and get to bed without clearing the house from the night before and it is a tip.
When I fall back into tiny breaths breathing.
I start missing medication, sleeping terribly, nightmares return. Dehydrated, no appetite.

Good thread!

 

[shimmerz]

I teach wellness courses. It's very interactive and there is much talk about wellness tools. We get a few big pieces of paper, stick them to the wall, and just start writing based on what people say helps them feel 'better'. The list is as diverse as could be from one group to the next and one person to the next.

One of the things that I speak about is having a wellness list for those days that things feel too big. Sort of a scaled down version where the person realizes that the day is going to be a little more challenging. A list of simple wellness tools helps keep people in the groove without being overwhelming.

I think the biggest thing with routines is to have them written down. Like really thought about. What does make me feel better and how do I incorporate that into a day. I really like the idea of the whiteboard too because I also suffer from the steel door in my brain problem when I am having issues. Being able to have the list - boom - right in front of me reminds me to keep going.

I incorporate for myself aromatherapy blends that I diffuse in the house when I am feeling so so. It helps to swing me into a higher gear almost immediately. That works for me but maybe won't work for anyone else.

It takes real work to figure out what low energy forms of wellness tools are but it is well worth it in the end. Good luck to you @TheBubzilla !

 

[DharmaGirl]

.no, I don't find it exhausting.

It sounds like a nice selection of things to do. I am making my self-care list again, and I am putting everything I can think of on it. It doesn't mean I'll do each one every day, more like what @shimmerz was saying. I love the low energy list.

I also worry about the damage I've done my son. During the 2 years I was in and out of the hospital, and had over 7 suicide attempts (which the sperm donor told him when he was 14 all about), I wrecked so much that I had worked on raising him. He changed. I feel guilty, but he has to want to get help. He still has this idea that I need taking care of, and now at 21, seems to be putting his life on hold to make sure I'm ok. I'm ok. My worse days are better than my best days then. He is still a kind, wonderful, insightful person, the kind I wanted to raise, so don't spend time agonizing over your parenting. I let him talk about his feelings without becoming defensive, and it hurts but we resolve issues.

To answer your original question and get back on track, I stop showering as much, my house becomes a mess, I sleep a lot. I don't want to go anywhere.

 

[HëllaBubz]

aromatherapy blends that I diffuse in the house when I am feeling so so. It helps to swing me into a higher gear almost immediately.

One of my managers has essential oils that she does the same thing with, and I'm going to give them a try once I've saved up.

It takes real work to figure out what low energy forms of wellness tools are

Very true! But I am developing a range to select from.

so don't spend time agonizing over your parenting. I let him talk about his feelings without becoming defensive, and it hurts but we resolve issues.

This is how my parenting works - I'm pulled in so many directions that it's hard being in the present which is what she needs.
It's improving though.
My daughter does things to take care of me which I find incredibly sweet, I thank her for and also remind her that it's mummysm job to take care of mummy, but mummy is proud of the empathic, kind and thoughtful person she's becoming.
Child smiles and skips off to play.
I think whenever the lines are blurred and you feel bad, sometimes the out loud firm affirmation of roles as well as appreciation help both of us.

lost in translation!

Most probably, but it was a good reminder not to get too invested in things that I may end up relying too heavily on too.

Here's to self knowledge :)