Is there a future?

[TTC18]

I am not good at imagining the future. I've had any number of people who've asked me the 'Where do you see yourself in 5 years' question. I draw a blank, every time and generally just make something up.
I'm thinking - "5 years? Is there such a thing as 5 years from now?"
I can look at the future in short-term concepts, as in, 'Do I have enough money to pay the bills this month and next month?' But anything beyond a few months out is a blur. It feels imaginary. Like - why bother planning and thinking about the future, when anything could happen? Is this a PTSD thing, or something else? (I'm still coming to terms with the idea that I may have PTSD, so please forgive all the questions.)

 

[Strangelongtrip]

Trauma can lead someone to think this way. I wish I had the article I found on it. I didn’t see a year from now until this year, for my entire life. But it’s possible to overcome!

 

[digger]

I think it's been dropped from the current DSM criteria, but in the previous diagnostic criteria a 'sense of foreshortened future' was recognised as a symptom of PTSD under the avoidance/numbing section of possible symptoms.

It's certainly something I struggle with.

 

[TTC18]

Thank you for answering. I've felt this way - a sort of 'oh well, it doesn't matter anyway' about the future since I was a kid. I was terrified at what was going to happen to me because I had done something and was going to get in trouble, and then just stopped being afraid, thinking - well, either they'll kill me, and then I'll be dead, and I won't have to worry about it anymore, or else they won't kill me, and I'll be alive, and then someday I'll grow up and can get away. And then, after that, I just really didn't think about the future anymore. Which doesn't even make sense because I'm terrified all the time. You'd think that if I wasn't worried about the future, I wouldn't be worried about anything. But, no.

 

[Tinyflame]

Yes I always had the sense of a fore-shortened future post ptsd, some based on likelihood, some component simply 'there'/ my mind's truth. I simply could not envision it, at all.

I can only say,I recommend trying to act 'as if' there is one, or you will be shocked and at a loss later when you're still 'here' later. (JMHExperience). Even if you still can't really envision it.

Best wishes to you. :hug:

 

[whiteraven]

I am not good at imagining the future. I've had any number of people who've asked me the 'Where do you see yourself in 5 years' question. I draw a blank, every time and generally just make something up.
I'm thinking - "5 years? Is there such a thing as 5 years from now?"

I have this very same issue. It's become a lot worse in the last...year, maybe. I wish I could give you advice, but I still haven't been able to figure it out. Just know you are not alone in this!

 

[TTC18]

Thanks, that really helps. :)

 

[frogthroat]

I can look at the future in short-term concepts, as in, 'Do I have enough money to pay the bills this month and next month?' But anything beyond a few months out is a blur. It feels imaginary. Like - why bother planning and thinking about the future, when anything could happen?

I'm struggling with this same problem. I literally have no sense of direction right now and it drives me nuts. It makes me feel lazy in a sense like why don't I care?
My T doesn't seem to be super concerned with this at this point. I think it's an important subject to keep on the backburner but initially you have to start getting better first. That will all come to you the more you heal and grow as a person. I think when it's too hard to do even the most basic things you don't really think about the future too much because it's too painful. Just do what you can and keep trying. Things will start to fall into place.

 

[EveHarrington]

Yes, it’s something many of us with ptsd struggle with. :hug:

 

[LuckiLee]

Most days my guy can see and plan for the future. Some days...not so much.

"How can I think about the future when I can't stop thinking about the past and I'm just trying to live in the present" J said this a couple of weeks ago. That's PTSD in a nutshell.

Hugs all around.

 

[TTC18]

I think it's an important subject to keep on the backburner but initially you have to start getting better first.

I think my issue is that I can't see 'getting better' either. I feel like I'm just treading water, trying to keep my head above the waves. If I thought there was land out there somewhere, I could point in that direction and swim - but all I can see is water, so I just concentrate on not drowning. It's clearly not productive - I've been doing this for 20+ years and a rescue helicopter hasn't shown up yet, but I just keep on treading water. Trying not to think of sharks, and all the other things that might be swimming around my legs where I can't see them.

"How can I think about the future when I can't stop thinking about the past and I'm just trying to live in the present"

Exactly - I think the only thing I'd change is:

"How can I think about the future when I can't stop thinking about the past and I'm just trying to survive in the present"

Thanks, everyone...

 

[Mach123]

I'd say it's depression and yes, a symptom. I panicked from High school on if anyone asked me what I was going to do. I believe now it's part of my submissive behaviour as in "if I let you do that to me, I don't have to do anything else." That's a direct quote from one of my therapists actually. BUT, things are better right now in that regard. We bought a house. (Closing in 2 weeks, long story). In general though I would say I suffer from this almost completely, and all I ever wanted was someone who couldn't live without me. (Sex) They can take care of all the bothersome details, like the future.