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Bonfire—toss your sh*t here

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Feeling ignored when folks don't pay attention to me, like if I say something or post something and they reply to someone else and say nothing to me nor look at me or anything. I hate this, yet I think maybe it is self-centeredness. There is a part of me that wants all the attention. I was really very much that way when I was a kid. I toss that in! Burn baby burn!!!
 
It was bad of me but I couldn't resist.

The fire entices us—some of us remember burning in a past life—the release of all burdens—no shame in being drawn to her power! :hug:

This fire is gorgeous! Thank you to all who are feeding her—I’m so glad we are here! I see more people in the distance, noticing the light, approaching cautiously.

Today I carefully lay down all my shame surrounding the expression of joy and pleasure in my body. I thank the shame for protecting me during my most vulnerable times, but I am here now, capable of protecting myself, and this is no longer needed. Whoosh!!! Aho!
 
The nightmares that kept me sleeping all day because they were so horrific that I was avoiding reality. The disability to be able to walk down the street without having a trigger and having to return home after a few blocks. The feeling of being totally helpless and disabled. The fact that I am disabled and cannot work. The fact that I can only take two classes this semester and will have to postpone graduation again. The fact that I was supposed to finish writing a letter for financial aid appeal but felt too depressed to do anything today. The fact that I went to art school which ruined my creativity. The fact that painting doesn't feel the same. The self doubt that I have. The people in my life who doubt me (I don't wish to burn them but I wish they knew how much they hurt me).

The fact that I feel so alone so I'm posting this.
 
Searching4Self: “...I see more people, in the distance, noticing the light, approaching cautiously...”

Beautifully, said, Searching4Self! Your bonfire brought me out of the hiding woods, drawn to the healing burning of those things that burn us from inside, if we can’t let them go. If you don’t mind, I’ll hang out in the periphery of the firelight, with fellow beloved known and not-yet-met wounded-healers. ‘Might toss in a few logs, myself.

It’s been a while since I’ve walked out into the open field, in too much pain to post, but this place, you beloved ones, have remained in my thoughts and heart.
 
If you don’t mind, I’ll hang out in the periphery of the firelight, with fellow beloved known and not-yet-met wounded-healers.

Perfect! Thank you for occupying that space and welcoming others! We are radiating out!

My bones are appreciating the warmth of this fire. And my soul keeps dancing with the smoke, up and out. So grateful for the blessings we have created.

Feeling the air flowing around us... even the wind is participating, carrying the smoke away from us.

Going to release my fear of my own voice by singing tones that rise in my throat and some songs. Now that I’ve thrown that shame in the fire I’m going to experiment with what it’s like to be unashamed with my self and my actions. It’s different from insecurity—unashamed feels like you all don’t mind my singing—that you actually like it—and some of you want to join me and share your own songs—and some of you want to watch and listen and appreciate, and some of you just want to stand here and not think anything. There is space enough for anyone who wants to be here.

The fire will die down inevitably, but we can return whenever we want.
 
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