Finally got a job after more than three years

[msjanetxtreme]

I just finished Day 2 of my first job in over three years! About a week back, I posted here about how I was losing sleep over interviews for two different jobs after submitting like crazy since Jan 2018 of this year. My interview for an admin/customer service role went well and they made me an offer. The company seems decent. (I've got huge trust issues so I'm skeptical about everything and everyone.) The job isn't my passion but I need a job that I *think* I can handle at this point in my recovery. I also decided to accept rather than interview at another company, then wait and see if they would offer me something.

I was sooo nervous! My last interview was on Monday of this week and I started on Thursday. My background check hadn't come in yet and my offer was conditional on passing. I've moved multiple times because of all the chaos and trauma in my life the past few years. But my background check is clear. So relieved. Just want to do my job, get better and go on with my life. These past three and a half years have been so, so, SO hard. It's nice to get a win!

Thank you all for all your support! Y'all have been so encouraging and so helpful.

 

[Chris-duck]

Nice one! Well done on getting the job, hope it works out well for you

 

[Freida]

Congratulations!!!!!

 

[honeymask]

I am so happy that you are finally feeling well enough to work again! I am looking for work for the first time in four years, and very scared that I won't be able to find something that I can handle. May I ask how you accounted for the three years you weren't able to work? I know a lot of employers will ask why I've been unemployed for so long and may hesitate to hire me because of that. Best of luck to you, you can do this!!

 

[msjanetxtreme]

I am so happy that you are finally feeling well enough to work again! I am looking for work for the first time in four years, and very scared that I won't be able to find something that I can handle. May I ask how you accounted for the three years you weren't able to work? I know a lot of employers will ask why I've been unemployed for so long and may hesitate to hire me because of that. Best of luck to you, you can do this!!

Hey Honeymask,

I can definitely relate to the apprehension that you feel about how to answer the question - "What have you been doing for X years?" I wrote out an answer that was honest and practiced, practiced, practiced saying it to myself until I felt confident. I was honest -- to a point. I said that I had been experiencing personal challenges and decided to do take care of it so that my professional life would thrive when I did return. (I work in office/corporate settings so that's why the language is sort of unnatural.)

Then, I said that pointed out other things that I did in the meantime -- take some courses, volunteer, and reevaluate my professional goals (finding meaningful work that aligned with my strengths) that related to the position that I was applying for. At the end of interviews, I asked the question to my interviewers: "Do you have any reservations about my fit for the job?" so we could talk about any concerns that they might have.

I spent time a lot of time reading this blog for work advice and job searching tips Ask a Manager

Hope this helps!

Oh, and I'm NOT confident about returning to work. I need the money. My therapist and I work together to help manage dissociative symptoms. It's really tough.

 

[honeymask]

I can definitely relate to the apprehension that you feel about how to answer the question - "What have you been doing for X years?" I wrote out an answer that was honest and practiced, practiced, practiced saying it to myself until I felt confident. I was honest -- to a point. I said that I had been experiencing personal challenges and decided to do take care of it so that my professional life would thrive when I did return. (I work in office/corporate settings so that's why the language is sort of unnatural.)

Ooh this is brilliant and helps so much!! I want to be honest as well, I am thinking of saying that I was recovering from an illness (true) but am excited to be well enough to work. I haven't been able to do any volunteering, etc such as yourself but I think I can play up my strengths if I practice. You really have given me hope for my future, thank you so much for that. <3

Oh, and I'm NOT confident about returning to work. I need the money. My therapist and I work together to help manage dissociative symptoms. It's really tough.

I am glad that you are at a place where you are managing your symptoms and that you have a therapist alongside you. I admire anyone who can work with such an illness, I know it is a tremendous challenge to overcome <3

 

[msjanetxtreme]

I won't lie. Job searching is really, really hard. Period. It's super hard even for people who don't have issues with PTSD, CPTSD and mental health.

In hindsight, I wish that I could've been much more gentle with myself in the process and not listened to other people who thought I wasn't working hard enough. They don't know what we go through. They don't know how just staying alive and breathing is hard sometimes.

What I'm trying to say is that take care of yourself first and do the best that you can with what you've got. I was really fortunate to be able to focus exclusively on recovery for about a year. Most people can't afford to do that. But I've got a lot of debt to pay off now and had to relocate three times in three months because I didn't have a place to live that I could afford. I have to go back to work and fingers crossed, I'll be able to keep doing it.

 

[honeymask]

In hindsight, I wish that I could've been much more gentle with myself in the process and not listened to other people who thought I wasn't working hard enough. They don't know what we go through. They don't know how just staying alive and breathing is hard sometimes.

I have had so many people tell me that I am not doing enough. What they don't understand is that recovery is a full time job, and it is the hardest job I've ever had to do. I also have had to relocate about three times a year due to financial reasons. I have had to sacrifice so much just to ensure that I could continue to stay alive. I am still sacrificing and will be continuing to sacrifice for recovery. I totally understand that struggle.

Know that you are not alone, and that you make a difference just by being here and sharing your experiences. I've got my fingers crossed for you, too.