If it's any consolation, you're worth a lot to me :)
Thank you
@ziter :hug:
So glad to see how much you're getting better, @bellbird
Thank you SRG :hug:
. I also want to suggest that not everyone is great with being in hospitals, or seeing people that they love in pain - so even though it's selfish, some of them they may not be visiting for those reasons and not because they really deep down don't care about you.
Many people have problems with hospitals, so maybe it's that.
Yeah, I can appreciate that this could be the case.
I just think that telling someone (in all cases they offered; I never asked) that you will visit them, and then completely ghosting them when you've heard that they are in hospital, is not the way to manage that trigger/stressor.
On another subject, that is great you are doing so well walking. Now if you would only start pooping. Hopefully as you wean the pain meds it will happen.
I have never wanted to poop so badly in my entire life :D
I think today will be enema #3.
I kind of hope we can do two enemas today, a few hours apart.
Clearly from past experience, one is not enough to provide a lasting effect.
But it is bizarre that I have so much enema experience now that I know there are two different types, and I know how they differ.
Have they measured you yet to see how much taller you are?
Not yet :)
I think this is something they will do at my 6 week post op check up, which will be the first time I see my surgeon after leaving the hospital.
At the moment, the pain of my preggo belly means I'm not able to stand up very straight.
I also have the interesting case where I would have grown some amount, instantaneously, when they straightened my lumbar curve in surgery.
But I will also
continue to grow for a while after, because my thoracic curve which is smaller and exists to compensate for the lumbar one, has enough flexibility to readjust itself, without fusion, now that it doesn't need to compensate as much.
I missed your thread at the beginning too, but you have all my well wishes from the beginning, plus now, so you have an amazing amount of well wishes!
Thank you very much
@DharmaGirl . I am so grateful for support at any stage along this journey.
--
Argh. Ok.
I seem to have sussed my night time pattern of pain.
~2am and ~6am wake ups are high pain times. I need to ask again if I can have a heatpack for my pain.
I've had some pain meds now (it's 6.30am), and I've got my tv on to try distract myself.
It's about an hour until the doctors come past.
Crossing fingers and toes it'll be cute registrar :inlove::laugh:
I think I'll get on with my recap.
I think where we left Day 0, was me waking up from anaesthesia.
My memories from that time are understandably very blurred.
I remember my nurse telling me to open my eyes, and asking me to squeeze her hands or wiggle my toes.
I remember some time later, hearing the voices of my parents. They sounded so far away. As if they were standing outside of the room and talking to me. My brother's voice, too.
They were telling me that I did well. That is was over.
I also remember thinking that they sounded ok, and that reassured me.
That was at about 5pm. So 9 hours since they said goodbye to me in the morning.
It was a long day.
My mum told me later that one of the first things I said to my dad was asking him if he'd got his hair piece yet (he's nearly bald) :hilarious::hilarious:
My family were there for a little while, but didn't stay. They could now go back to their beds for an actual sleep knowing I'd made it through.
And I think my night consisted of rounds of being asked to open my hands, wiggle toes, and squeeze hands.
My nurse told me later that I was very very excited that I could wiggle my toes, and that I kept telling her I could.
She was wonderful, that nurse.
My breathing rate was being constantly monitored. It had dropped quite dangerously low. I was breathing 4-6 times a minute, where normal breathing happens 12 times a minute.
Day 1: Friday 1 March
Few memories of this day, also.
More of the same consciousness exercises.
The hand squeezing exercise evolved to check for delirium; I had to squeeze my nurse's hand only on the letter A
"C A B A CDA BLA"
My parents and brother visited again.
I became more aware of my pain, and felt more awake. Or at least thought I did; I rang my friend D on that day, and she told me later that I was very stoned.
Understandably so; I would have been on all my machines at that stage still.
Ketamine infusion (constant)
Morphine PCA pump (available every 5 min)
Local anaesthetic through a catheter by my left collar bone (every 4 hours)
IV fluids
Urine catheter
Constant pulse, blood O2, BP measurements
Electrodes in place for ECG
That's the ones I can remember.
Oh and a chest drain.
How could I forget.
That motherf*cker was the single most physically painful thing I have ever experienced.
I had a pneumothorax, which meant I had fluid and air around my lung.
I had to do breathing exercises because I had a high risk of infection from that build-up.
I had to have chest xrays, to monitor my lungs. The radiographers came to me with a portable machine. Which was cool.
But oh wow. Having to sit up (hospital bed behind me) with a hard x-ray board being squeezed between your back and the bed, one day after a spinal fusion.
Not fun. Really really not fun.
I think Friday was the day that I was first allowed tiny sips of water. And tiny amounts of soft food. Bread with jam and margarine. But I could only eat very small amounts.
I think Friday was also the day I was fitted for a brace.
Whilst lying down.. in ICU.. one day post-op.
Also not fun.
So, I wasn't going to need a brace post-op. But, there was a minor complication in surgery.
One of my screws couldn't make the contact with my bone that they were hoping.
It was one of my top screws, so one of the least important ones (the most important screws were the bottom ones where my curve had been most severe).
But still not good.
When fusion is ultimately achieved, there will be no issue. But until then, and for the first 6 weeks post op especially, I need to wear a brace whenever I'm not in bed.
My brace can't fit over my preggo belly, so I can't wear it currently.
Now you can see how the issue with my abdominal distension extends far beyond the discomfort.
Day 1 Friday was also the day that my nurses tried to get me up for the first time.
It didn't go quite to plan.
They taught me the "log roll" which is a technique to get out of bed safely and without twisting my spine (which I'm currently not allowed to do).
First, I roll onto my right side (incision is on my left) by bending my left knee, crossing my left arm over my chest, and rolling over. With a lot of help at that stage.
Then I wiggle so I'm lying on my side with both legs hanging off the side of the bed.
And then sit up on the side of the bed.
My body wasn't having it.
We got as far as sitting up, twice, and both times my BP dropped, and I went into shock and almost fainted.
So we left it there till tomorrow.
I also learnt my breathing exercises.
Inhale through my nose, fully.
Hold for two.
Exhale through my mouth, fully.
Then, two "huffs" -- medium inhale through an open mouth, and breathing out with force as though you're trying to fog up a window.
Followed by a couple of coughs.
The different techniques are more effective when combined in series.
But god. It hurt like hell.
Friday was also the day that my surgeon came by and introduced me to his team (cute registrar said that was when we first met). Which kind of amuses me looking back because it seems kind of bizarre to be introduced to a team like you are supposed to remember them, when you are so off your face. And because I was more occupied with trying to tell my surgeon that I could wiggle my toes :laugh:
Yes. I think that was the extent of post-op day one.
And perfect timing, too; it's breakfast time :)
